


StepTad

by AwatereJones



Series: Torchwwod Style Movie re-writes [19]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Drama, Gen, Movie rewrite, Romance, tissue alert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-09-28 17:40:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 27,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17187443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwatereJones/pseuds/AwatereJones
Summary: So ... I love Stepmom. A favorate movie, always makes me cry. So here we go ... let's see if you all remember this one. Gwen is the exwife, Ianto the new 'bit' and Jack is caught in the middle with the two kids. The adpoted daughter Toshiko (as Gwen was told she coulnd't have kids) and the surprise miracle son Owen. Keepng pretty true to the movie with a few minor tweaks.





	1. Chapter 1

A billowy white scene. An alarm clock BLARES. The lovely sleeping face of Ianto Jones rolls into sight.

Then out of it. Alarm keeps blasting. Back he comes, pulling the sheets over his head. Motionless now, as we hear... the DEAFENING SILENCE of the alarm shutting off. A beat.

Ianto sits bolt upright. Leaps out of the room. From the back we see that he's dressed only in a pair of socks.

he makes it halfway down the hall, does a U TURN back into the bedroom, frantically yanks a robe hanging from the door, taking the wall hook with him. he FLINGS his robe on as he runs down the hall, wall hook sticking out of the back.

Bursting into Owen's room he shouts "Owen! You overslept again damn it!"

The room looks like a 6 (but I'm almost 7) year old exploded. Posters of magicians on all the walls. Ianto darts about the room mismatching the clothes Ianto forgot to arrange the night before.

"Get Up Get Up Get Up!" The lump under the cover doesn't move. "Owen you're late. I'm serious. I'm wearing a very serious face. Don't make me start counting ONE..."

No movement. Ianto tugs the sleeve of a shirt hanging on a chair, and out comes a magician's bouquet of flowers "TWO."

He pulls a dirty handkerchief out of the pocket of the shirt -it's an endless handkerchief.

"Don't make me say three I'm about to say three." a beat, then "Three!"

he RIPS the covers off and a blow-up dinosaur sleeps in Owen's place. "Owen I'm not kidding around. You make yourself appear this instant!"

A white rabbit saunters across his toes. Ianto screams – then gathers his wits and searches under the bed - under the bureau - he opens the closet doors and shoving clothes aside.

"You might think this is funny but this is actually NOT funny."

Unseen by Ianto, six-year-old Owen sits, perched on the highest closet shelf, knees under his chin, holding his breath. His eyes gleeful as Ianto frantically closes the closet door.

Ianto hops over the Bunny, navigates through strewn toys and books stubbing his baby toe. he limps in agony past a big picture of the kids with their daddy and heads towards a door with a KEEP OUT EVERYONE! sign.

Bellowing, he slams into the room "TOSHIKO! WAKE UP!"

Toshiko, 10 years old, sits on the edge of her bed, fuming, all of her limbs crossed. She holds up a filthy purple tee shirt. "You forgot to wash my purple shirt. I told you a hundred times it was Purple Day at school today."

"I didn't forget. I was up all night thinking about it and I concluded you're too special to look like everyone else." he grabs an orangey red tee shirt "Orange Red. That's your colour. Few can carry it off. Now please. Help me find your brother."

"You lost Owen?!"

"Of course not. Does he look lost to you?" big breath "OWENNNNN!"

.

.

.

.

Ianto, smoking a cigarette and drinking a diet coke, flings open pantry doors, closet doors - looking for Owen - attempting to put stone hard butter on toast at the same time. He glances at the clock - 7:55. Oh dear. Toshiko sits at the table, in a grumpy orangey red mood. Ianto hands her what was once a piece of toast.

"No. I told you. I like apple butter not butter butter." She pouts.

Ianto hands her an apple "Here."

"Never mind. I'll just eat my lunch."

Ianto forgot and tries to hide it "I'm almost done making it."

to the non-existent Owen Ianto speaks like he is there next to him listening "Alright Owen - you deal with the tardy, you write yourself a note, your daddy told you he had an important case this morning and he had to leave early and we were AAAAGGGGHHHH!"

He has opened a cupboard with a Lazy Susan that turns revealing

Owen sitting there. Ianto screams again "Oh my God. That is so not funny. You're late. You're really late. Now get out here and have some cereal."

"No."

"Fine! Eat in the cupboard."

He hands him a bowl of sugared cereal - puts two spoonfuls of instant coffee in Barney cup, and sticks it under the faucet.

"No! Cocoa Puffs on Top - Fruit Loops on the bottom." Owen roars with indignation.

"Fine." Ianto grabs the bowl, turns it UPSIDE DOWN on the table reversing the order of the cereal. He sweeps it back in the bowl and quickly hands it back to him, the phone rings constantly...

"You touched it."

"Then have a donut"

"No."

"Alright starve."

"I'm gonna beep daddy at work" Toshiko huffs reaching for the phone.

"He's badgering a witness. Eat." Ianto snatches the still ringing phone from her.

"But you told us to starve." Owen points out.

Picking up the phone, Ianto glares at them then says pleasantly "Hello?... Duncan... The Ad Agency's already there?... I'm out the door..."

Owen flings a fruit loop at him "Owen! Knock it off!"

Then Ianto purrs into the phone "It's gonna go beautifully..."

Another fruit loop

"Damn it Owen"

Ianto runs around absentmindedly loading out leftover pizza, Hoho's, and Chips. She glances at the clock again - 8:00.

"You swore. You owe me a quarter." Toshiko crows "Did you remember my egg carton? I told you I needed my egg carton for seed planting today."

"Absolutely Duncan I'm on top of everything." Ianto takes the eggs from the fridge, and dumps them – accidentally missing the sink. They shatter onto the floor. he hands the empty carton to Toshiko. "EGGzactly. I'm putting on my coat"

He hangs up, panicked "We are late. We are seriously late. Which means Mister Owen we've got to get you dressed"

"No!"

Owen races away but Ianto lunges And catches him. He wiggles in Ianto's arms as he struggles to change his clothes. Just as he gets his bottoms off he drops his clothes in the pile of gooey eggs when we hear a loud knocking at the kitchen door. Holding a half naked Owen in his arms, Ianto looks up at... Gwen Cooper. An immaculately dressed, intimidatingly intelligent, utterly beautiful woman staring at him with extreme disapproval.

"Mommy!"

Toshiko and Owen race into their mother's arms like little angels.

Gwen shoots a fiercely protective glare at Ianto. They lock eyes. Enough wattage to light up all of Manhattan.

Gwen and the kids exit Ianto's building, onto a bustling Soho street. The kids clamber into the double-parked Volvo wagon. Gwen, still pissed, climbs behind the wheel. Drives off.

Gwen drives the children down a tree-lined street in Englewood, New Jersey. Owen is banging Gwen's sunglasses case against the window.

"..it's really not so bad Toshiko – Red and Blue make purple."

"I don't care." yes she does.

"I know you don't, but if you had, chromatically you are in the purple family." Gwen fishes through her purse. Finds a toy airplane for Owen. He

stops banging her glasses case, starts banging the plane.

"Why does Ianto wear Daddy's socks?" Owen asks "And doesn't he have underpants of his own? Nekid!"

"I noticed a whopping pile of laundry sitting on the washer - perhaps Ianto's underpants are in there - Now where are your lunches?"

As if by rote, they hold out their lunches. One is a plastic Vons bag and the other a crumpled Macy's bag. She collects them and hands Owen and Toshiko two brightly coloured lunch bags.

"Toshiko sucked her thumb last night." Owen crows.

"I NEVER do that, you ALWAYS lie!" she snarls and slugs him.

"Never say 'never' - it's not fair to say 'always' - and no name calling." Gwen scolds "Use your words."

"I hate when you say that."

"Thank you. Those were all words. I hate the planet Uranus. Terrible name for a planet." Toshiko and Owen look up at her curiously. She continues "I hate snails and blue cheese. Especially together. Hate."

"I hate lava." Owen offers.

Gwen reflects "Lava's hateable. I never thought of that."

"I hate overly ripe bananas - they make me want to throw up." Toshiko provides.

"Excellent point." Gwen agrees.

"I hate wax lips and red ants and pretzels without salt..." Owen sing-sings.

"I hate the crayon Burnt Sienna and people who spit when they walk." Toshiko snorts.

Gwen nods sagely. Pulls up next to a school playground.

"I hate to say goodbye. Eskimo Kiss." they rub noses "Russian Orthodox Wedding Kiss."

They bump foreheads and elbows. Owen runs toward the kindergarten playground; Gwen watches concerned as Toshiko climbs the steps.

The only orangey red dot in a sea of purple.


	2. it's complicated

Taxi pulls up to a converted warehouse. Ianto bolts out, sprinting for the door.

Black and white. Like a checkerboard. We are seeing a group of penguins waddling against a black and white backdrop. We see a white waiter in a black tuxedo holding glasses on a tray. A black woman, Iman, in a white dress glides through it all.

In the centre the only dash of colour is Ianto - who has just entered and starts expertly directing the action. he calls out to his assistant, Andy. Perpetually hip. Perpetually young. "Andy, back the fill off I don't have enough shadow..."

"You've got a fruit loop in your hair." Andy blinks with shock.

"You say that like I don't know that."

"I once threw an entire bowl of jello on my stepmother's head" Andy supplies.

Ianto lowers the camera to ask "And when did that pass?"

"Actually, never." Andy apologises "They'll always hate you. There's a gene for it."

Duncan Samuels - Ianto's boss, an elegant, edgy, Englishman interrupts them. "Congratulations. Only forty minutes late. You're handling this promotion really well Ianto."

"Duncan. My work is everything to me." Ianto promises "This'll never happen again. Now stand back - this session's gonna make you remember why you hired me even though I wouldn't sleep with you – Andy let's get these penguins dancing.

Duncan backs off, charmed by his ballsiness. The music blares just then, and a penguin juts forward and nips the model. The flash of the camera. We FREEZE for a second, seeing the photo Ianto just took. An Avedonesque portrait of a model being GOOSED by a penguin COLLIDING with a maitre'd who SPILLS his tray and the penguins seem to be POINTING and LAUGHING uproariously.

It's an inspired photo.

.

.

.

.

SCHOOL COUNSELOR'S OFFICE - 2:30 THAT DAY

Gwen and Jack Harkness - ruggedly handsome man, mid-forties, charming, disarming, and smart as they come. They sit side by side on a couch across from Estelle Franklin, an Elementary School Counsellor.

"Mr. and Mrs. Harkness, while change is exhilarating for adults, it can be quite challenging for a child."

Jack's beeper beeps. He ignores it; focuses on Mr. Franklin. "I won't get that...It's fine. Change. We were talking about change."

"The fact that you two are remarrying obviously has Toshiko overjoyed..." they look at her, dumbfounded "And she's very excited about your move to Switzerland."

"She said we're getting remarried?" Gwen blinks.

Suddenly - a long bell rings - Gwen stands up, startled.

"Only a fire drill. My concern is that Toshiko seems apathetic towards her work knowing she's leaving before the end of the semester." Mrs. Franklin sighs.

"Mrs. Franklin we're not …" Gwen splutters.

"Planning on getting" Jack agrees.

"Remarried. There is no move." Gwen finishes.

trying to appear unfazed she asks "Really? Well then my concern for …"

Jack's beeper BEEPS again. They talk right over Mrs. Franklin...

"Are you here?" Gwen snarls.

"I'm here."

"Because you don't really seem here." Gwen scoffs.

"I'm here. I've got a case where they're this close to sequestering the jury but have I answered the goddamn thing?!" Jack hisses back.

Gwen slowly speaks "Something's up wi..."

"You think I didn't get that?" Jack snaps.

She cuts a look at Mrs. Franklin. "Excuse him. He never learned how to turn the darn thing off."

And reaches. Does it for him.

Mrs. Franklin asks "I'm wondering if there's anything going on at home that could be intensifying Toshiko's need to create this fantasy?"

Long pause. Then suddenly they both start speaking AT ONCE.

"I've been with someone for quite some time, and didn't feel it was appropriate for him to move in too quickly. But after a lot of thought and careful discussion with him - and the kids I might add - he moved in last month." Jack says calmly.

Gwen speaks louder over top of him "Since our divorce Jack has seen a number of different women and men I might add in three short years and without a lot of warning for the kids, he's now living with a man half his age …"

"Ianto's not half my age." Jack challenges.

"We're not discussing your age." Gwen rolls her eyes.

"Well, we're not discussing Ianto's age either." Jacks' face had a finality to it and Gwen knows she is pushing.

"They want to be with you Jack, they go to your house to be with their father."

"Gwen, they come to be part of my life." Jack is almost pleading with her now "Ianto is part of that life."

"Mr. Harkness, I hear you talking about your life, your needs, but are you really in touch with what Toshiko needs?" Mrs. Franklin asks.

Jack leans back as if struck and Gwen is suddenly fierce "This man would walk through fire for Toshiko, gladly, any day of the week."

"Napalm." Jack agrees.

"Except for last Thursday when Ianto forgot to pick them up" Gwen finishes with a look of triumph.

"Gwen, he was five minutes late" Jack is angry again.

"I'm wondering if Toshiko is responding to the underlying hostility that exists between Ianto and Mrs. Harkness..." Mrs. Franklin frowns.

"Cooper actually" Gwen corrects.

Jack flaps his arms with frustration "Of course she's responding to it. You think it's easy for any of us? You think it's easy for Gwen to watch her kids being looked after by someone who has less than half the experience she does? Of course she's going to be hostile, irrational, and defensive."

"Thank you Jack."

Mrs. Franklin doesn't quite know what to say. The bell rings.

"Thank you Mrs. Franklin. Gwen?" Jack is polite again. "This has been very valuable for us. And I'll have a serious talk with Toshiko tonight."

"It's Wednesday night. She's at my house." Gwen reminds him "I'll talk to her."

"I'll call from work. We can have a conference call." Jack says with a nod of his head.

You tried that last week and we were on hold forty-five minutes..." And they're out the door. You can hear the fight as it echoes down the elementary school hallway.

Gwen and Jack exit the pleasant suburban school. Head for the parking area...

"You ask me that counsellor's making a mountain out of a molehill..." Jack scoffs.

"I'm worried." Gwen admits

"Me too." Jack sighs.

"Jack, I need to switch next Friday for Thursday, so why don't you take the weekend..." Gwen says pointedly "...that way you'll be there, and I'll pick up Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday."

"Fine." Jack stops walking then says "But I wanted to take the kids to work with me on Wednesday so I'll take Wednesday, and you can pick up that Thursday, Friday after soccer, and Saturday before riding."

"Easy enough." Gwen nods.

"Good...Well...Take care."

As if on automatic pilot they move in to kiss each other goodbye then stop. Each takes a step back. 15 years of hellos and goodbyes. A beat. A wave. They head their separate ways.

.

.

.

.

Gwen setting the table. Toshiko recording the moment with her omnipresent Video camera... "I didn't say that. Why would I say that?"

"Well Daddy and I were thinking that sometimes people tell a story about what they wish would happen." Gwen says, not waiting for the conference call clearly.

"I don't want that to happen" Toshiko snorts "Why would I want that to happen?"

"Well you're telling your teachers and your friends …"

"Mass hysteria".

"Maybe you're upset that Ianto moved in." Gwen glances at her.

"I'm not upset. Why would I be upset?"

"Look if the truth is you don't feel like talking about this right now that's fine. But don't look me in the eye with a big smile on your face and lie to me." Gwen warns "Cause there are only so many lies you're allowed to tell before it starts showing on your face. You wind up looking like..."

She stops. It's just too horrible. Was she about to be nasty to her own child?

"Like who?"

"Well, he's not president anymore, so why be petty."

Owen enters in white gloves and Gwen's scarf. "Pick a card. Any card."

Gwen picks a card.

"It just slipped out." Toshiko whimpers softly.

"It happens" Gwen forgives.

Toshiko glances at her then asks "What happens when he loves Ianto more than us?"

Gwen feels her heart cleave "That will never happen."

"Never say never you always say that." Toshiko sniffles "I'll bet daddy's mad at me now."

"Queen of diamonds." Owen says with flair, totally ignoring his sister's meltdown.

"Seven of clubs." Gwen shrugs "Nobody's mad we just want to talk about it."

"I'm gonna call him." Toshiko decides.

"Toshiko, daddy and I will always be there. That's one time always is always. You can call him after dinner but..."

Toshiko runs out of the room. Gwen watches her sadly. Owen hits Gwen hard with his magic wand. "Poof! You're happy now."

"Thank you Owen." Gwen sighs then unhappily follows her daughter "Toshiko!"

Owen finds himself alone in the kitchen. He hits himself on the head, hard. Poof! He begins to serve himself dinner.

Alone.


	3. truth and dares

Ianto and Jack exit a neighbourhood bistro. Stroll down the street.

Ianto is irritated "Okay, if they're going to have a sauce, put something in it besides flour and chicken broth..."

Quietly Jack sighs which shows this is not a new complaint "It was a veal stock, I thi..."

"Well, it wasn't a reduction like you do it!" Ianto snorts "Boiling down half a ton of bones..."

Jack is thinking of something. Ianto's watching that. "The way you cook. If you could make love, I'd marry you."

Softly Jack says "We have to talk."

Ianto is happy and laughs "Uh-oh. I mention marriage, all of a sudden... (ominous Nazi Baritone) Ve haff to ta..."

"I didn't want to spoil our supper..."

"You'd rather spoil our walk home." Ianto's' smile fades.

"Yeh, it's cheaper."

"Okay, what?"

Jack says it all in a one breath of rush "I just found out I have to go to Boston to get a deposition. I might not be back until Saturday."

Mock horror as Ianto squeals "So I'll have to order in?"

Dropping the other shoe, Jack adds "We have the kids this weekend, so..."

Softly Ianto sighs "Jesus."

Jack glances over...

"I thought it was her weekend." Ianto slumps "Do I ever see you alone?"

Jack draws a breath. The concern is behind his eyes. "Anyway, I thought...while I'm gone... maybe I'll hire in some help."

"For what?"

"Just a babysitter - I mean...you're working..." Jack flounders.

"I can take them to work with me – I can shift things around …" Ianto brushes it off.

"You don't need to. I don't expect you to handle them yourself."

Ianto huffs "Can't handle them myself is what you mean. Can't."

Maybe he's right. Because Jack doesn't say anything. Ianto is hurt and he gapes at Jack "You don't trust me to be alone with them."

Jack splutters "I trust you of course I do but …"

"But? But what?"

"But you're not good at this. Not yet." Jack admits, then grimaces at the pain on Ianto's face "I'm sorry."

"I know how responsible, caring adults parent children." Ianto tries flippant "I'm gonna bribe 'em. Buy 'em a dog or something. Maybe a Doberman."

Jack loves him. But this problem is real.

"Look. I know they hate me." Ianto says after the silence becomes unnerving.

"They don't hate you"

"And what you're telling them is keep hating me - keep up the good work" Ianto snaps.

"Nobody's telling them to hate you"

"Really?" Ianto laughs sarcastically "Look in your ex-wife's eyes."

"It's complicated for Gwen. It's complicated for me...You don't have kids - you don't understand…" Jack is cut off with Ianto swinging to face him, the anger now evident.

"Oh right" Ianto loudly exclaims "So it's just complicated for you and Gwen - for me it's pretty simple 'cause I just don't understand..."

"No you don't. And I'm not gonna screw with my kids heads right now" Jack is firing back and Ianto feels the sting like a verbal slap, turning away.

Ianto starts to walk again, throwing over his shoulder "You know I don't need another person in this family making me feel like an idiot...your ex-wife's doing a bang up job and I have to face it every Tuesday and Thursday and every other goddamn weekend and I just don't know how the hell you were married to her for so goddamn long! Jesus what did you see in her? I don't get it - I just don't get it."

They've reached their building. As they enter Jack sighs "She's a great mother."

.

.

.

The door of the freight elevator clangs open. As Ianto and Jack step out into their loft, the phone is ringing. he looks to Jack. Then runs to snatch it up "Hello?"

.

.

.

Toshiko sits in her closet with a phone in her closet. Hearing Ianto, she hangs up. A pink POST IT creeps under the door.

**CAN I JOIN YOU FOR DESSERT IN THE CLOSET? VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE YOGURT. PLEASE CHECK ONE.**

.

.

.

.

The most beautiful little puppy in the world - sitting in a puddle of pee on a hardwood floor.

"Aw George...not again... who wants to help clean up this time?" Ianto is speaking in an overly zealous voice "Toshiko?"

He looks around - completely exhausted. It's late. Toshiko is videotaping the dog pee. Owen's in the kitchen talking to himself. He pours and sprinkles, working intently on a magic potion.

"Why do you make that face when you talk to me?" she imitates Ianto "And that voice you use...you think I'm deaf or something?"

Owen ZAPS the magic potion theatrically with his fingertips.

Reaching for her, Ianto sighs "I'm sorry, okay? Let's not fi..."

"Don't touch me! I'm allergic to you!" She starts sneezing furiously and scratching. Owen comes out of the kitchen carrying a steaming cup of potion.

"Those who travel far and near this will make you DISAPPEAR!" Owen says theatrically.

"I have to work on my video project! Don't follow me! I can put myself to bed." She races upstairs. Ianto follows. So does Owen. And George.

"Excuse me" Owen calls out.

Ianto is following her into Toshiko's room "Toshiko let's get something clear."

"I don't have to listen to you! You're not my mother."

"Thank God for that!" he leaves the room SLAMMING the door behind him. Takes a breath, turns, and walks back in. "What I meant and perhaps I didn't say it well was you have a great mom. You don't need another one. But when you're at this house …"

"This is my daddy's house"

"This is my house too!" Ianto spits before he can stop himself.

"And this is my room so get out!" Toshiko screams.

"Excuse me." Owen calls from the landing again. Ianto throws open the door. Owen stands there innocently. "I made you some cocoa. See?"

"Thank you Owen. That was so sweet of you." Ianto sighs, then says pointedly to Toshiko "Goodnight Toshiko. Sweet dreams."

Ianto leads Owen to his room. With Ianto safe out of sight, Toshiko takes the puppy into her arms and cuddles it.

.

.

.

.

Ianto, dead on his feet, reads "Goodnight Moon" to Owen. "In the great green room there was a telephone and a red balloon..."

"Aren't you going to drink your cocoa?" Owen asks "It's the good kind."

Faking a big sip Ianto hums "Mmmm! Tasty. You're a master chef Owen. Just like your dad."

Owen points to the book - he 'reads' skipping pages, a hundred miles an hour desperate to get to the end of the book. ""Goodnight moon, goodnight hush, goodnight mush, goodnight goodnight goodnight Gracie - Goodnight Owen!"

"No! You're cheating - you have to start from the beginning and you have to read the whole thing I can't sleep otherwise." Owen's eyes are glued to him. He lays down next to him, yawns.

"In the great green room there was a telephone and a red balloon..."

"And a picture of the cow jumping over the moon..." Owen picks up the story he knows by heart.

laying his head down, Ianto sighs "That's nice Owen."

Owen reads until Ianto's asleep. He looks at him in AWE.

"Ianto! Ianto!"

No response. Ianto's really asleep. He lifts his head. It flops down! In horror he jumps off the bed and with a quick look back, races from the room, and...Darts down the hallway, bumping into walls - He LEAPS inside Toshiko's room, slamming the door behind him.

"Owen! What's wrong?"

Owen bellows triumphantly "I killed him!"

Owen and Toshiko gape at one another, stunned.


	4. magicians make things disappear ya know

GWEN'S HOUSE - MORNING

Ianto pulls up fast in Jack's Grand Cherokee. As he screeches to a stop, the kids pile out with their gear.

Ianto takes an anxious look toward Gwen's place. Here we go.

The clock reads 8:10. Ianto and the kids enter. Toshiko's hair is brushed forward, hiding her face. Owen is bright. Gwen's edgy, ready to snap.

"How do you hold down a job?" Gwen starts straight in "It's 8:10. You were supposed to be here at 7:00. She's missed her sunrise Groom'n Ride."

"This is Friday, her riding lesson is on Tuesdays." Ianto pulls out post its "I got it right here..."

"Every Tuesday except the 3rd Tuesday of the month when it's switched to Friday except in April when she rides on Thursday. It's not that hard. Didn't you have a mother?" Gwen sneers knowing full well Ianto's mother is dead.

Flinching, Ianto tries to ignore the jibe "Can I please have a cup of coffee?"

"We don't have any coffee."

"What is this? The Betty Ford Center?" Ianto mutters as he frowns at her.

"Toshiko, how's your video rep..." Toshiko rushes past her. Owen saunters off after his sister. Gwen turns to Ianto, accusingly. "What happened with Toshiko? Has nothing I said gotten through to you?"

"Maybe you could back off just a little bit…" Ianto pleads, his head ready to explode.

"What did you do?" Gwen demands folding her arms in that accusatory way Ianto hates.

"Nothing. Look, I want to talk to you about...well...Jack said to ask you..."

Gwen's edge sharpened by Ianto's unease.

"See, the place where I can connect with Toshiko is my photography. Because she loves video and all..."

"And...?" Gwen demands.

"She's been talking about this little editing machine, it's only..."

Gwen cuts him off at the knees "a ridiculously expensive and inappropriate item, which her father and I have already told her she is far too young to own. But you apparently want to buy her forgiveness, with..."

Ianto has had enough "Forgiveness? For what, exactly? I didn't steal him from you .. you were already divorced for the love of kittens!"

Silence.

Gwen knows she had gone too far and backtracks to the earlier argument "How much time have you got? Let's start with this morning. Why did she run from this room?"

Long beat. Then, Ianto looks dead on at Gwen. "Jack was in the shower this morning and Toshiko sort of walked in without knocking."

"I'm sure that didn't upset her. Everyone in our family takes showers."

"I was in there in him" Ianto adds.

The air is thick with tension.

"Did you or Jack talk to her about it afterwards?" Gwen asks with deadly calm.

"No. I thought it might be uncomfortable for her …" Ianto is over this, not his kid and it shouldn't be his problem. He really didn't sign up for the baggage Jack has dragged into the relationship when he promised it wouldn't change things to live together.

"You mean for you! A 10-year-old girl is coping with the fact that her father is never coming back to live with his family. She sees her father naked with another man for the first time. And you think it's best for her if every- one pretends it didn't happen?" Gwen is righteous now, turning away "This isn't going to work out."

"You're damn right." Ianto explodes "I'm gonna get sick of your imperious bullshit. I never said I was Betty Fucking Crocker. If every time life hits her in the face you want to have a 12 hour talk every third Friday or the month - go ahead! I have a life!"

"Oh and I don't because I have a children?!" Gwen sneers "The problem is you're too self-involved to ever be a parental."

"Maybe the problem is your kids. Maybe they're spoiled, coddled brats!"

"Get out!" Gwen screams with rage.

Ianto smiles sweetly holding up the Post Its "But it's not on the schedule!"

"You got to hell!" Gwen turns away, storming out of the room.

"Ah Ah Ah! You owe me a quarter"

.

.

.

.

YMCA KITCHEN

Jack stands in an apron before Toshiko's Girl Scout Troop, rolling out a large pie dough. They imitate his every move.

"Now Ladies, the secrets to a great pie is the crust. And the secret to a

great flaky pie crust comes from less flour and more...what?"

"Ice cold water." Toshiko says with confidence.

Jack adoringly agrees "That's my girl..."

Ianto watches from a corner.

"Blueberry pie must be topped with vanilla Haagan Daz and/or creme fraiche... now the secret to a great creme fraiche is..."

"Orange peel!" all the girls yell with delight.

"...which also is the secret to..."

"French toast!" they yell and laugh with glee.

"Now don't forget to teach your fathers that. Next week...apple brown betty!" He takes off his apron and walks toward Ianto as the girls file out.

"She said no." Ianto pouts.

He doesn't even know what he's talking about.

"The editing machine. I mean, Toshiko would have really loved it." Ianto clarifies anyway. He looks down. "It would have been great for us, so obviously, Gwen just…" Eyes down. Choosing his words. "She's really a difficult person..." Looks up. "Best thing ever happened to you was her throwing you out on your butt."

An afterthought... "Not that I have a personal stake in it."

Jack comes and kisses him. "Get ready. To get really mad."

"Uh. Toshiko's video report has been switched again."

"Not yet." Jack shakes his head.

"Hey, I sold my body to Satan to clear Friday at two o'clo..." Ianto starts to rant but Jack cuts him off.

"We have the kids." Jack barks, cringing "Next weekend."

"WHAT?"

"And it's my call. I promised them water-skiing, instead o..."

Ianto whispers with quiet pain "Our weekend. At that sweet little B & B."

Jack puts his arms around him. "And the evil part is. I am so stoked about the water-skiing. I can't wait."

Jack tastes his mouth. And again. A sweet, hot moment. Ianto's fingers trace up his neck. To his hair.

"No, this is good." Ianto finally whispers "Celibacy is healthy. For a guy your age. You'll get used to it."

From the kiss that follows. He won't have to.

.

.

.

GWEN'S KITCHEN - ANSWERING MACHINE. IT CLICKS, WHIRLS, and...

 _"Hi, it's the trophy bimbo. Toshiko's teacher called, and her video report is being moved up to 8:30 tomorrow. Sorry to deprive your step aerobics class of their role model."_ Pause. Ianto is heard sighing softly _"Anyway. I'm sorry I lost my temper the other day. And I'm sure you are,…"_

Owen looming over the hardware. Fingers poised above the buttons, and he...

_"...no, apology necessa..."_

...strikes! Playing all the keys at once. Like chords on a baby grand.

.

.

.

.

CLASSROOM

A small TV MONITOR, the angelic face of 10-year-old Tamara, practicing for the Miss America Diplomatic Interview, circa 2009... "Well, if I had a million dollars... I would use it to...feed all the precious hungry children of the world. And bring about total world peace."

The class and teacher are watching raptly. Filmmaker Toshiko in the seat of honour next to her proud father. Ianto in the back of the room, anxiously looking at the back door. While on screen...

...another face. Jared, bad as he wanna be... "A million big ones. Oh. I'd buy about a thousand babes. Not to do anything bad, I mean. Just to hang with."

Near the monitor, Toshiko's eyes are also furtively cutting to the classroom's back door. On screen now...

...the handsomest 10-year-old since DiCaprio. Brad the Dreamboat. Stares soulfully at the camera. Murmurs "Well, first off, Toshiko. I'd give half of it. To you."

The class OOOOOS, WHISTLES. Toshiko flushes, but she clearly likes it. Brad grins a Redford grin her way. And through the back door BURSTS...a harried, dishevelled GWEN. Still in workout clothes. As on screen...

"There you have it." Toshiko says on the screen "Now ask yourself ...what would YOU do?"

The screen goes BLACK.

The class, teacher and especially Jack ERUPT with APPLAUSE. So does Gwen, who has locked eyes across the room with her mortally-wounded abandoned daughter. Then Gwen's eyes move to...Ianto, a deer in headlights. Death by Army ants would be too kind.

Toshiko, Jack and Gwen Glaring at Ianto, who looks awkwardly at his feet. Kids stream past, unaware of the gravity of the moment.

"Machines do not EAT message." Gwen snarls.

"Look, I..."

"Of all the cheap excuses. To break a child's heart."

The jury is in. There is no appeal. Gwen takes her daughter's hand.

"Don't worry, sweetie, there's still the Harvest Pageant. And you are the lead vegetable..." Gwen says with bottomless pride. "And nothing. And no one. Can keep me away.

One laser look at Jack. This is your responsibility. And she leads her baby off.


	5. twisting that knife

A parked SUV, packed with snowboards and ski gear. No people. Jack, dejected, at Gwen's door. Ianto nearby, still peers into the window of an unlit, empty house. A cellular phone rings.

Jack whips it out, like the Governor's pardon hangs in the balance. Gwen asks from carphone "You paged us?"

Jack is distraught "Where are you?"

Gwen on her cellular, herding the kids toward a CIRCUS tent "Just outside the big top, we're almo..."

"You're WHERE?" Jack roars.

Gwen keeps talking "At the Big Apple Circus, it's the only big top I know. I said I'd get 'em back tonight..."

"Gwen, we were taking them water-skiing for the whole weekend!" Jack yells with exasperation.

Gwen says with an innocent voice "...until the plan changed, when Jessie's mom gave us these tickets. What, Ianto. 'forgot' I told him?"

Jack's eyes dart to an uncomprehended Ianto. he's never seen him this angry.

"Don't tell me. Another machine ate another message? Boy, there's a lot of that going around! Put him on, huh?" A beat. He hands the phone to Ianto.

He brings it to his ear "Yeh?

"Think twice. Before you ever pull that again."

CLICK. The line is dead. And so is Ianto.

.

.

.

CENTRAL PARK CASTLE

A glum Toshiko and Owen sitting on a bench watching Ianto at his photo shoot, George between them.

A beautiful woman appears in the turret - she lets down her hair -a modern day Rapunzel - her golden locks fall 17 feet - now a burst of yellow - as a hundred yellow canaries fly out from her mane! A beautiful man begins to climb the hair. FLASH! The man dangling in mid air surrounded by canaries.

Ianto works with intense concentration. It's been hours. Toshiko and Owen are completely bored.

Ianto says to Andy "The timing was off - I need this light."

Toshiko mutters to herself "Just where I wanna be all Saturd..."

Ianto yells to everyone "Hold lunch!"

"But we're hungry" Toshiko roars "and I have to pick up my costume for the pageant! It starts at seven!"

"It's only one o'clock...Why don't you get another Fudgesicle - I'll be done soon - really soon." Ianto promises absently.

Toshiko and Owen. Rolling their eyes.

LATER...Toshiko asleep on the bench. Ianto stands over her, a canary on his finger. "Lunch time Sleeping Beauty. Where's Owen? Is he in the bathroom?"

"I don't know...I feel like I'm gonna throw up."

.

.

.

PARK MEN'S ROOM

Toshiko stands with Ianto by a line of empty urinals.

"What if he's kidnapped?" she asks.

"He's not kidnapped he's - he's just hiding - he's just - OWENNNN? GODDAMMIT!" Panicked, he grabs Toshiko's hand.

"Don't touch me! You bring bad luck!" she screams with rage.

Ianto winces. Starting to believe it lets go.

MOMENTS LATER … CASTLE TOWER

Breathless, Toshiko and Ianto climb the castle stairs when they hear whimpering - Ianto follows the whimpering - running – "Owen! Owen we're here! OWEN!"

In the corner of the tower George is staring up at him. But Owen is NOWHERE to be found.

"He's gone forever and I'm gonna miss the pageant." Toshiko wails.

Ianto sighs once more.

His life flashing before his eyes.

.

.

..

POLICE STATION, CENTRAL PARK

Gwen BLASTS up in the Volvo, SLAMS to a stop in a non-spot, races into the police station moving down corridors past desks until she sees Owen sitting with two policemen on a bench. She holds him to her chest, shaking. "Owen! Oh my Owen! Are you alright?"

"I knew where I was all the time." Owen assures her.

.

.

.

AUDITORIUM - THAT EVENING

Owen sits between Gwen and Jack holding each of their hands. Ianto sits on the other side of Jack; all waiting for the Harvest Pageant to begin. It's horribly tense.

Ianto is sincerely apologising "Gwen? I am so sorry about today I really fucked up royalty. When you called Jack I was so goddamn relieved …"

Jack elbows him with a "We're in an Elementary School" elbow.

"No I did - I know I did - I screwed up. I feel like such an asshole..."

Gwen lifts Owen onto her lap, holding him tightly. She turns and faces Ianto, claws bared. "Shhhhhh!"

The lights go down. They sit pretending the other is not there.

On stage - The class is dressed as the harvest Produce. Toshiko is the Corn. Each Food Dish steps forward and introduces rehearing her line over and over.

"Hello! I am Maze. But you can call me Corn. Hello! I am..."

Inside her costume, her breathing is sharp. She stands very straight, very bold. A brazen ear of corn. She steps forward. "Hello! I am..."

Ianto POPS UP next to the stage with his huge professional camera and giant flash. His camera flashes three times, quickly. After each flash, we see the picture for a split second, Toshiko. A terrified ear of corn. A lost ear of corn.

Toshiko blinks, disoriented "Um...I'm...I'm...Oh..."

In the audience, Gwen is willing her daughter a recovery. Sees instead a completely devastated ear of corn.

Exploding in tears Toshiko howls "Oh forget it!"

She runs offstage amidst laughter and applause. Jack looks over at Gwen but she and Owen have already left their seats.

Gwen comforts Toshiko. Owen watches closely, getting caught up in his sister's sadness. Jack and Ianto approach.

"I hate him. I really hate him." Toshiko sobs.

"There you are!" Jack says.

Covering her face Toshio wails "Don't take my picture!"

She starts to cry. Owen's lip quivers, his eyes well up.

"Toshiko doesn't really want to talk to you right now." Gwen snarls.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to break your concentration." Ianto croons "I thought it would be a nice moment to rememb..."

"I don't ever want to remember this!" Toshiko snarls like her mother.

A Turkey approaches. "They're taking a picture of the Produce, we need the Corn. C'mon Toshiko."

See? No one's laughing at you. Your friends want you to join them, Toshi. Corn is a very important part of the Harvest Produce. Now Owen, walk your sister over to the Yams."

Owen takes Toshiko's hand. When they are gone.

Ianto takes a deep breath "Gwen, if I thought for one moment..."

Gwen ignores him, lighting into Jack "You listen carefully because I am only going to say this once. That man has nothing more to do with my children."

"Our children."

"Do you realize what could have happened to your son today? How lucky we are the police found him before some lunatic did? He could have been..."

"But he hasn't. Jack said forcefully "He wandered off. I know it's terrifying. I can imagine how you felt when that call came - But it happens."

"Not to me."

Jack tries to be soft, reasonable "Gwen, you've made mistakes - We all make mistakes"

"I'm not gonna wait around to see the next one. I'm not gonna watch my kids fall through the cracks of this arrangement. I'm seeing a lawyer." Gwen says with triumph.

"Gwen stop." Jack pleads "We promised we never go there."

"We've broken a lot of promises, haven't we Jack?"

"Why are you taking this out on him?" Ianto asks.

Jack waves a hand "Yan, get out of th..."

Ianto is still speaking to Gwen "You haven't done one goddamn thing to make any of this easier..."

"I am not here to make it easier for you. These are my children." Gwen thumps her chest "They don't want to be with you."

"Well, maybe they would if they thought it was okay, with y..."

Gwen is poking Jack's chest "A court order is gonna say that man is never alone with my children! Ever again! Do you HEAR that?"

All of New Jersey heard that. On the silence that follows, she stalks off. The mother lion. Doing what she has to do.

.

.

.

.

NORTH VALE STABLES

Gwen and her children ride horses side by side through a perfect Fall afternoon. Our riders look about alertly, as if patrolling enemy territory.

Toshiko speaks in a pompous voice "Guinevere, Godiva, I sense enemy sol..."

Owen cuts her off "I don't want to be Lady Godiva anymore, no matter how much I like chocolate. I want to be a stud."

In distance, a gaggle of Groundskeepers. Gwen points these out to Owen, without missing a beat "Lord Nelson, Napoleon's troops. I fear for the women and the property values."

"I'll ride ahead. Nelson, protect the Queen" Toshiko demands and she canters off, blood in her eye. Alone now with his mom, Owen has something serious on his mind.

"Mommy?" Owen says softly "It's not Ianto's fault I ran away."

Gwen doesn't turn "No, that's your fault. It's his fault for not watching over my precious son, as if it were his priority. Which means, the most important job."

Owen thinks about this "Ianto's job is he works."

"Owen, mommies work too. They work very hard. Mommy works harder as a mom than she did when she was working. I just don't get paid."

"Does Ianto make a lot of money?"

"People like Ianto who only think about themselves often do make a lot of money." Gwen sniffs.

"I think he's nice, Mommy."

"Yes...if you like big hands..."

"Mommy?"

"What honey?"

"If you want me to hate him I will." Owen says sadly.

Gwen is stunned.

Her lips part for an answer.

But she hasn't got one.


	6. an uneasy truce?

Jack pacing around on the path through Gwen's front lawn. Gwen exits the house, alone. Stands on the porch. And they stare at each other.

"You know, you can come inside the house."

He looks at the end of his rope. She walks down to him. He asks quietly "Did you see the lawyer?"

"Oh. Well..." Gwen shuffles her feet "Called him. We set an ap..."

Almost a whisper Jack sighs "Don't do this."

So vulnerable. The air comes out of her. We see how much she still cares for this man.

"You're saying, don't make the kids a football, don't put them through a war." Gwen sighs "But I'm doing this for their well-being."

"Partly. But partly, you're mad."

Staring. At each other.

"You know the kids aren't really in danger." Jack challenges "This is about Ianto, and you're right, I'm disappointed in him …a learning curve, and..."

"Slugs." Gwen snorts "They have faster learning curves. Trees, even. We both know it was the Welsh accent you fell for. Just like mine. All the world and you find another Welsh lover."

He takes a breath. Here it is "I'm afraid he's going to walk."

"And I'm supposed to care."

He reaches out. Takes her hands. Whispers softly "About me, yeh. Like I care about you."

She looks in his eyes. "Like you cared about me three years ago?"

He shrugs. Looks saddened by that. Reminds her softly "Hey. You kicked me out."

And just this once. With all that's happened. Gwen needs to Say "Maybe you should talk to your daughter, about why. She seems to have missed that part."

Now he looks ashamed. And sorry from his heart.

Gwen says softly "Forget I said that."

He has to tell her "This thing with Yan. I need this. I don't want to lose him. And I will see to it that the kids don't suffer. Help me, huh?"

"Help me." She repeats.

"I'd do it for you." Yes, he would. Despite everything, she knows that.

"One last chance, don't make me regret it" Her voice tried to be tough. But the tension showed through. "...or you will, too."

A last look. She walks slowly. Back toward the house.

.

.

.

CAR POOL LINE, ELEMENTARY SCHOOL

The last cars are pulling away. No kids left, except the ones shooting hoops. Except. On the low brick ledge by the flag pole...Toshiko sits. Alone. Quietly freaking.

.

.

.

Ianto and Andy sit on a bare floor surrounded by countless proofs of flying canaries. An assistant brings a cell phone to Ianto, who holds it in place with his shoulder, as he frantically speaks into the phone.

"...no, no, that is not possible. You must have the wrong little gir..." Stops. Speaks into phone "...because Toshiko's mother never forgets, is never late, is never imperfect. So that's some other kid sitting on the curb by the car pool li..."

Listens.

All the air comes out. He looks around, sadly, at all the work surrounding him.

Andy hisses "May I remind you that Duncan has the client arriving at exac..."

"Sure. I was just doin' my nails."

.

.

.

A cavernous sterile room. A horrible METALLIC HAMMERING sound. We to see that it comes from...a white cylindrical TUBE. Bare feet protrude. An MRI is in progress. The sound stops. The body SLIDES from the tube, a woman in a hospital gown. She is Gwen.

She blinks at the light. Her eyes are drawn, a million miles away. A lot on her mind. A technician enters the room "Your pager went off during the procedure. Do you want the number?"

Gwen turns, suddenly focusing "Wait...what time is it?"

.

.

.

PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE

Toshiko sits glumly, refusing to eat some chips from the bag in Ianto's hand. Ianto's voice is low, soothing. Dare we say, maternal "Hey, sea salt and vinegar, I know this is your fave."

Toshiko keeps her eyes down. This is more than a sulk. She seems fairly unglued.

"C'mon, these are the Bomb, I prom..."

Toshiko suddenly says "Now could she just...forget me!"

Looks up. Eyes desperate. "I mean, that's something you would do!"

Ianto stares back. Eats a chip. Decides... says softly "Tell ya the truth? I did."

The kid blinks. A non-compute.

"Your mom had to...help a friend with this...emergency? And she called me. And we switched days. Then, I got stuck on my shoot, and..."

"MOMMY!"

Ianto WHIRLS to see Gwen filling the doorway, Toshiko flying to her mother's arms. The women's eyes meet. How much did she hear?

.

.

.

GWEN'S BATHROOM

Gwen brushing out Toshiko's hair. Gwen's eyes are distant. Toshiko watching in the mirror.

"Are you worried about your friend?" Toshiko asks "With the emergency?"

Gwen's eyes come back to focus. "Hmm? Oh, I'm waiting on some news, that's all. Say. Can I ask you why you never asked me something you probably asked Daddy anyway?"

And she smiles. Real carefree. So Toshiko smiles back.

"You can try."

More brushing. Gentler, slower strokes. "Daddy was washing Ianto. In the shower. What did you think that was about?"

"Sex. Of course."

"Oh." Gwen blinks "Well, not exactly s..."

"Why does Ianto scream?"

Does he mean what Gwen thinks she means? "Scream."

"During sex."

"Oh." Again. "How would you know h..."

"I live." Toshiko says theatrically "…In the same country."

Her mother laughs. Encouraged...

"Oh God oh God Oh God oh God oh God Oh..." Toshiko imitates Ianto.

"...why do you think?" Gwen asks.

"Because it feels really incredibly good."

Gwen moves around. Leans to stare in her eyes. "So why are you asking me?"

"I like talking about it. At least, to you."

The look holds. Almost a bittersweet smile plays on Gwen's lips. She leans to kiss her daughter's head. "Same here, huh?"

.

.

.

IANTO'S DARKROOM - MORNING

TOTAL DARKNESS - Slowly an image appears - Floating in a pool of water. It's a photo of a child's feet. Only the wrong shoe is on the wrong foot. Suddenly, knocking as Ianto calls out "Hold on! Don't let the light..."

Gwen enters, leaving the door wide open.

"...in."

"I'm sorry." Gwen sniffs, showing she is clearly not "Look, I'm not real comfortable being here, but..."

"I don't recall inviting you."

Silence.

"I overhead what you told Toshiko." Gwen finally breaks the silence "The lie."

Unreadable faces. What are they feeling?

"I have a snoop." Ianto sniffs.

Gwen blusters "I didn't need you to take the blame for me, I'm quite..."

Ianto says simply "I didn't do it for you. Believe me."

And Gwen finds that interesting.

He shrugs "She already hates me. You've seen to that."

Gwen bristles "You're not terribly good at taking care of h..."

"I need practice." Ianto argues back.

"Those are my children you're practicing on. They deserve first-rate care. Every minute. Of every night. And every day." More silence. "So why did y..."

"I did it for her." Ianto stares straight into her eyes. "Poor kid has to believe in someone. Even if it's only you."

Nothing friendly about it. But Gwen hasn't come seeking friendship. "I have an appointment this afternoon. I need someone to take them to the park."

"What? And have Federal agents jump out of the bushes with court orders?" Ianto snorts, folding his arms as he eyeballs her "How many years do you get in this state for giving second-rate care to minors?"

Hard looks. All around.

"However many. It's not enough." Gwen finally says.

"I'm already on thin ice. Yesterday, I actually thought my boss was going to fire me." Ianto admits.

"Fine, forget it."

But neither of them wants to. A Mexican Standoff. Until Gwen empties her huge purse on the counter. "Bandaids for cuts. Bandaids for new shoe blisters. Packet of Wash n Dri's. Kleenex. Sugar free lollipops, potty seat covers for public restrooms..."

"Why not just bring the whole toilet?" Ianto asks.

"Owen likes to be read to. Do you know Dr. Seuss...?"

"Not personally." Ianto can't help himself, an eyebrow rising as her scowl deepens.

"Do you have a word limit you need to hit every day or can I finish?" Gwen asks with syrupy sweetness.

This silences Ianto. Gwen hands him a Post It. "Here's their schedule for this afternoon. I'll meet you at the park at five. All I ask is that they're alive when I get there."

A beat.

Then Ianto gives a dry "Thank you." And scoops up the parenting paraphernalia.

Gwen gives a drier "Thank you." And walks out the door.


	7. ain't that a kick in the teeth

Gwen stands outside a door. Deciding. She knocks and enters...Duncan's office. He sits behind his desk, across from a client. Both men looking up at this stranger.

Mr. Samuels? Forgive the intrusion, I'm Gwen Cooper Harkness, and..." The sweetest smile she's got. Which is pretty good. "...well, I just wanted to thank you. For your generosity."

A beat, then he splutters "Gener..."

"My daughter had a terrible emergency yesterday. My husband and I couldn't be reached, and...your Mr Jones came to Toshiko's rescue." Confides... "I'd hate to think what might have happened."

"He told me that you were so supportive, even at great inconvenience to your business, and..." An amazing smile. "It's wonderful to see a successful man such as yourself with that sense of priorities."

A longer beat then he says slowly "Well...under the circumstances..."

"If I can ever repay your kindness. It would be my great pleasure." Backing out the door... "...and your Mr. Jones? A remarkable young man."

The client is beaming.

Clearing his throat Duncan agrees "We think so."

.

.

.

.

Gwen is looking down. She seems to be staring at something in her lap as she hisses with quiet anger "I don't even know what that means. Spread. That is very unclear."

...but there is nothing there. Her lap is empty. Except for her unnaturally still hands.

"It means we found some cells. In your lymph nodes. In three of them."

The hands come together. Slowly, deliberately. Stating to anyone who would watch that there is no panic here.

"But the other time." Gwen chooses her words "You said you got it all. So you could be wrong again. One time, you say one thing, then..."

"The other time. Was a year ago."

The air comes out of Gwen. In a thin, slow, precise stream. Everything, her very breath. Under complete control.

The doctor continues to speak "That was a tiny lump in the breast. We radiated, we thought we had it all. We were hopeful. But there were no guarantees."

Silence. Gwen's eyes stay on her folded, still, hands.

"But we can beat it." She whispers.

DR. Morrison is 50, slender, elegant, kind. The doctor you want when you're dying. Gwen looks up to her. "People beat it, don't they? All the time."

The Doctor gives it straight "Every day. More and more."

Gwen swallows. The confirmation of hope has allowed some of the fear to show. "So we'll...radiate some more?"

"At first. Then, after awhile, some chemo."

A blow. Gwen absorbs this. "That's necessary, huh?"

"Let's take our best shot."

Gwen nods. Staring at the woman. Then, to break the spell she huffs "I guess a no-hair day beats a bad-hair day."

The doctor smiles.

Gwen looks at her watch "I have to get dressed. My ex-husband has asked me to dinner. God knows why, he was very mysteri..."

"Have you still never told him?" the doctor asks.

A flash of the anger flickers. "Why would I want to be his worry? Or my children's worry. Or anyone's worry. Help the sit..."

very softly the doctor advises "Sooner than later. You really need to."

That brings a silence. A shading of defiance to Gwen's features. "You don't burden others needlessly. That's how I was raised, Doctor."

Hold the look.

"Maybe at dinner tonight" the Doctor softly advises "Think about it."

.

.

.

.

Gwen is getting dressed in front of the mirror, her eyes distant, in spite of her attempts at control. Toshiko is watching her like a hawk. We see Owen sawing the babysitter Alice in half.

"Why are you going to a French restaurant?" Toshiko demands.

Throughout, Toshiko is trying on Gwen's jewellery, making a pest of herself. Gwen fights against rising irritation.

"Because it's quiet. And he wants to talk. Alice - Once he saws you in half it's bedtime please"

"What are you gonna talk about?" Toshiko asks, examining her mother's reflection.

Gwen answers while applying mascara "Probably you - your brother - school -The solar system...The usual..."

"Then why are you putting on mascara?"

A beat the Gwen admits "I'm a little tired and it's just a pick-me-up."

Toshiko is not ready to back off "But you only wore mascara when you and Daddy went on romantic dates..."

"Well Daddy and I are just friends now, and that's no reason not to wear mascara..."

"Or blush." Tosh snorts "You look pale."

.

.

.

.

A Country French place on the West Side. Classy, but inviting.

Gwen and Jack sit across from each other in the lovely restaurant. Gwen looks beautiful in the warm candlelight.

"...Maybe you don't think three years is enough for a person to change but...things are different now Gwen." Jack assures her "I'm different."

Gwen feels her heart beginning to race. They lock eyes for a moment. He unconsciously begins to eat off her plate. He eats her chicken, and in the dance they've done a thousand times – she reaches for his uneaten vegetables. The waiter approaches. "Would you and your wife prefer still or sparkling water?"

He doesn't correct the waiter. "Still, please."

When the waiter leaves Gwen says pleasantly "Toshiko showed me the new dress. She's amazing in it."

"Getting so beautiful...she looks more like a woman every day." Jack downs Gwen's wine "Gwen...I've really given this a lot of thought. A great deal of thought..."

Their eyes lock for a moment. Here it comes...

"I'm gonna marry Ianto. I know you don't think much of him but he's a special person - he really is. And I love him. This is a bridge we never wanted to cross but it's not helping him or the kids if I don't really commit to that."

Gwen stares at him stonefaced.

"I didn't think a phone call was appropriate..." Jack smiles weakly.

"Tell me exactly how you're different from three years ago? The music sounds kind of the same from where I'm sitting." Gwen sneers, then hears herself and grimaces.

He shifts in his chair. Wants this to sound as authentic as he feels it "I grew up, a little. I'm ready for a life that's built around commitm..."

"Just not to me."

The waiter returns with a bottle of red wine. It's horribly quiet as he pours. Waits, obtrusively.

"Thank you, it's fine" Jack waves a hand.

"Would you like to taste it?" the waiter looks down his nose at Jack.

Jack explodes "Can we please have less service, here?"

The waiter leaves, taking his attitude with him.

Jack sighs "It's going to be hard for the kids when I tell them...I'd like you to be there."

"To make it easier for them or you?" Gwen demands.

"It's a huge moment in their life …"

"You can't be an 'us' just when you want to. You can't play that card when it's convenient." Gwen cuts him off.

"We..."

"WE are over." Gwen snaps.

Jack takes a calm breath like Ianto taught him to "WE'RE still their parents for the next hundred years."

On this, Gwen looks down at her hands.

"You're still going to have to be dealing with me - with us. We should tell them together." Jack explains.

"No." Gwen looks away "You think this is going to help the kids then you do it. You're on your own."

.

.

.

.

Gwen sits next to Jack on the couch at Jack and Ianto's apartment looking lovingly towards the children, who sit across from them. Toshiko is taping this...

"The great thing about life is that things keep changing." Gwen is trying to sound positive.

"Remember when Mommy and Daddy got divorced?" Jack asks.

"And we all went through that together?"

Owen rolls his eyes. OH MY GOD. He knew it!

Toshiko is behind the video camera "Where's this headed?"

"Well things are going to change again..." Gwen begins and Owen LEAPS up from the couch and FLIES into Gwen's arms.

"I knew it! I knew it! I knew you guys were getting back together!" Owen cries with glee.

Gwen looks at Jack. Toshiko ZOOMS IN on their faces.

"No they're not." Toshiko says in a droll voice.

"Toshiko put down that camera." Jack asks. She ZOOMS in on his face. "Put down that goddamn camera!"

"You owe me a quarter."

"Look she's upset" Gwen defends her.

No I'm not. I don't care. Why should I care? I mean nobody asked me when you got divorced. Nobody asked me if I wanted a new mother or father. Nobody even asked me if I like him. If you guys don't care about our family staying together!" Toshiko challenges.

"Daddy and I tried hard. We really did." Gwen assures her.

"No you didn't!" Owen yells "All you guys did was name call! I heard you! You didn't even try and use your words!"

Owen runs out of the room. Jack follows him.

Owen runs to his room and pulls his cape over his head and hides in a bundle in the corner. "I'm disappearing. I'm almost invisible..."

Holding him, Jack whispers "I'll find you wherever you go...my magic boy...I'm still your daddy...nothing will ever change that."

Gwen moves to Toshiko who won't put down the camera. "Toshiko...Ianto's not taking my place as your parental - it's just Daddy's chance to be happy again. Isn't that what we all want for each other?"

No answers. Gwen looks at this daughter she loves so much. Pats the seat beside her "Come. Sit."

Something in the softening of the tone changes the atmosphere in the room. More real. More like equals. "Life is full of hard things. And we can't always have what we want, you know that. Don't you?"

Toshiko nods, cautiously.

"But we do have a choice. To make it better. Instead of worse."

"Like how?"

"Like seeing the good side of Ianto." Gwen points out "So he'll see the good side of us."

Toshiko's stare is hard and questioning. She didn't expect this.

Gwen continues "Because I'm looking ahead. And you know what I see...?"

Toshiko doesn't. But she sure is listening.

"Time will come. When we all need to be there. For each other." Strokes her baby's hair. "That happens. To families."

Toshiko says straight back "I'll be there for you."

Her mother's eyes cloud with feeling.

A murmured "I'm counting on it."


	8. desperation sets in

Barely any light in Ianto's empty kitchen. Owen, alone, in his cape. Carefully, he sets a cup of saucer atop a cloth napkin

He GRASPS the corners of the napkin. He looks scared. We get what's about to happen. As he...YANKS the napkin, as FAST as he can, the cup and saucer, RATTLE and...stay put.

Owen. Is astounded.

And then he looks up.

To a cabinet filled with glassware and china.

.

.

.

In the bedroom Jack is kneeling by Ianto who is asleep. He gently takes his hand and fiddles a bit, then pulled his hand back so we can see he has tied a thread to Ianto's finger.

He speaks softly "Good morning Good morning, baby I've got something for you"

"You do?" Ianto mutters into his pillow.

"Yeah But you have to wake up to get it Ok"

"Hi - Hi I'm awake" Ianto blinks and looks at the piece of thread around his finger "Ah … You shouldn't have?"

"The first time I got married... ...we'd been together since college... ...and marriage... just seemed like the next step It was just something that happened But I think for two people to really love each other... to really... commit to each other... ...it has to be... ...it has to be an act of will" Jack starts to tighten the thread. "Or a decision And I think two people have to... live that decision every day. Even when things are hard and you feel like giving up... ...you have to... ...hang on to that decision... ...that choice to... ...to love each other Even if it's only by a thread I... let that thread break once This time, it won't "

Ianto's hand is still as a beautiful antique ring is slipped on his finger. He stares at his hand in shock and delight. "Oh my God. Are you serious?"

Tenderly Jack whispers "I think so...What do you think?"

"I think so too..."

They hold each other for a long time.

"It's forever you know." Jack says after a while.

Trying to read him, Ianto says "Okay...Is that the good thing or the bad thing?"

"Because I can't hurt anyone like this ever again." Jack sighs.

Ianto grins. "How did you hurt someone? She threw you out, remember?"

He does. Ianto hugs him tight as he says "Everything's gonna work out. The kids and I...we're going to love each other."

"Yan, it may take time."

"What's eight, ten years? Hell, you'll still be ambulatory. I think." he's counting on his fingers. Jack kisses him and Ianto adds "It's inevitable. Look, I was defensive, I was insecure. I was afraid to love first."

His incredible smile. Filling even Jack with confidence. "But I'm not anymore."

A sudden horrific CRASHING sound. The breakage of the breakable.

Their look holds.

"I'll get this." Ianto sighs. A quick kiss. And he's gone.

Jack's smile is light. Maybe this will all work out.

.

.

.

.

Owen is cuddled up in his coverlet. Almost as if he's hiding. Ianto picks up some stray underpants. Actually, three of them.

"Are you real mad?" Owen squeaks.

"How could I be? We learned some magic" Ianto replies calmly. He goes to his bed. Sits down. "I made all the pieces disappear."

"Oh."

"And you learned..." he leans toward him and kisses his forehead. Very sweetly. "...to make that trick disappear, huh?"

He nods. Big time.

Ianto stands, smiles "... A night. Of learning."

They share the smile. And Ianto leaves, into the darkened hall. Down it now, only to stop. Open a door, so quietly. Silently enter the room of a sleeping child. Ianto moves soundlessly to Toshiko's side. Stares down. Listens to the soft breathing.

He straightens the covers slightly, in a maternal way. Then, on impulse, reaches down...tenderly smoothes back a strand of hair. Leans down as his lips brush her skin. One last look. And he leaves.

The door closes.

Alone, now...Toshiko opens her eyes.

She is thinking.

.

.

.

Ianto is dropping off Toshiko at Gwen's door. They must be late, because Ianto is looking anxiously at his watch. Not even noticing that Toshiko has pulled out a tube of lip gloss, turning the shaft to reveal a glittering golden-coloured gloss. Then Ianto notices "Uh. Put that away, hon, your mom w..."

The door opens. Gwen is dressed for riding. Ianto tries a sincere smile "Sorry I'm late, I got lost dropping Owen off at Kevin's."

"It's okay, it's twenty minutes. The horse'll be there."

Ianto blinks. Is he on the right planet?

"Mom, look what Yan got me!" Uh-oh. The kid holds it up. "It's not to wear around, or anything, I'm way too young. It's just for play."

Ianto grimaces "My neice wanted some and ... it was on special ... See, I..."

Taking it, Gwen smiles "That is so pretty. You usually only see that colour in people's teeth."

Toshiko has entered the house, to see on a table by the door a huge, brightly-wrapped package. "Wow. Who's that for?"

Quietly Gwen replies "Well. It's for you."

The kid WHIRLS around. "Really?"

"Just because. Just because I love you. Go ahead..."

Toshiko starts to unwrap the present with Christmas-morning-care.

Gwen looks at the glitter gloss then Ianto who squirms "I'm sorry, I just..."

"Hey. At least it's not an editing machine."

"No way. I told her two, three years, maybe, for such an expens..." And stops. Because the paper has come off. A giant deluxe model beginner's VIDEO EDITOR. Toshiko is STUNNED silent. So's Ianto.

Toshiko sobs with tears in her eyes "Oh, Mommy..."

And JUMPS into Gwen's arms, CRUSHING her with the hug mothers live for.

"I hope it's the right kind."

"Are you kidding? It is so much better than the one Ianto showed me!" Toshiko crows.

Gwen strokes her baby's head. "Well, I thought. You know, why wait?"

The child turns to Ianto, frozen in the doorway "I told you I was big enough! Is my mom the greatest, or what?"

Ianto swallows. "The greatest."

.

.

.

Gwen and Toshiko riding. The kid is still on Cloud Nine. Gwen's eyes are on her.

"...I mean, he knows all the music, and pop stars, and clothes and stuff." Toshiko gushes

"He's like still a kid, himself." Gwen adds "Like a big brother"

"He knows every neat junk food place." Looks to see if her mom is okay hearing... "Actually. He's kind of cool, when you get to know him."

"I bet."

Toshiko studies her mom's profile. "And don't tell him I told you."

"Secret's safe with me."

.

.

.

.

Ianto sits cross-legged on the floor of the walk-in closet. Next to him, a glass and a bottle of Stolie, getting toward the bottom. An ashtray filled with butts, and...a cardboard box. Dragged out of somewhere. Photo albums, loose snapshots. Vintage stuff. From his face, this is not a carefree romp down Memory Lane. he takes another hit on the Stolie. More

than slightly intoxicated, weaving, squinting at...the next photo. Jack, young, straddling a Kawasaki. Gwen, just as young, holding him from behind. She wears a halter and shorts, and looks simply terrific.

Ianto looks drunk and jealous. With an overlay of self-pity. Brings the photo closer. Squints harder.

"What the fuck is that?" His worst fears confirmed "...a tattoo?"

.

.

.

.

.

The lights are coming on in the city. Gwen sits staring out the window, as an IV drips into her arm. She is alone, and down. And fighting the fear of what may come to pass. Her pager goes OFF.

Jesus.

She pulls a cell phone from her purse. Works it with one hand. Brings up...the smile. Showtime.

She says softly "Hey, good-lookin', I was just thinking about calling y..."

Owen on the phone in Ianto's and Jack's kitchen. He is alone. Staring through the glass window of the oven "Yan says I have to eat lamb. I told him you're making me spaghetti!"

"Honey, this is Thursday. I pick you up tomorrow, and we do big spaghetti."

"And many meatballs." Owen agrees.

A nurse enters, and Gwen shoots her with a wave of her fingers. "You'll be up to your armpits in meatballs, I'm flying them in from Sweden."

"Is that like Luigi's?"

She loves this kid so much. "Not a lot, sweetie. It's a country. Like Canada. Only smaller."

"Where are you, anyway?"

And the feeling comes straight to her eyes. She can't fight it. "I'm somewhere, thinking of you. And meatballs. And you know what?"

"Yes."

"Of course, you do. Being magic." Gwen smiles "Then you know I've got a flu bug, and I turn green and barf profusely when I even think about food. So, all the more meatballs for you. But you know that."

"I did. Do I have to eat lamb?" Owen huffs "Daddy didn't cook it, he did."

"Do me a favour? Eat it, and then give me a secret report, okay? Pay particular attention to whether it's chewy and if it tastes more like chocolate or soup."

He laughs. And she can hear that. And her eyes fill. And she murmurs "Hey, that's a world-class laugh you got there. Can I call you sometime? If I feel blue."

A silence. And for a heartbeat, the fear. Did he hear it in my voice?

But no... "Sure. You got my number."

And now she's crying. But she can't. She can't. Gains control for a whispered "That I do. Always will."

"Mom...?"

She sniffles "I'm fine, ba..."

"Tomorrow? Can I have one butterscotch pudding for dessert?" Owen pleads.

See her relief. Secret still safe. "Nope."

He's crestfallen.

"We can only have two."


	9. is this a new page?

Gwen is pushing her cart in the supermarket. Owen sits in it, pulling things off the shelves. On automatic she's putting them back.

"Mommy, if your real name's Gwen and I call you mommy; and Ianto's real name's Ianto...Then when I see him do I say hi Stepdad? Or … coz he's Welsh like you … is it Taddy? And if my name's Owen, how come you don't call me son?"

Gwen is lost in thought "Thursday's fine..."

Frustrated, Owen climbs out of the cart and trails behind Gwen. He reaches for an apple off the BOTTOM of a huge display of Red Delicious, and the whole thing comes tumbling down. Shaken, she looks around for Owen. He's gone.

.

.

.

.

Gwen is with a Store Manager and a Policeman stand at the front of the store near the Bakery. Gwen is totally distraught. "I looked away for one second...Just one second...he's...he's..."

"How would you describe him?" the officer asks calmly, no doubt used to this.

"He's my son! He looks like his father!" Gwen is beside herself, almost incoherent "His name is Owen – he answers to Harry …"

"Is he wearing a red shirt?" The manager points to the frozen food bin. There, lying on his back atop dwindling stores of ice cream...is Owen. Hands and beaming face pressed to the underside of the glass.

Gwen does the only reasonable thing... 'YYYAAAAAAAHHH!' ...and FLINGS OPEN Snow White's glass coffin. "ARE YOU CRAZY, YOU COULD SUFFOCATE IN THERE!"

"Nope. I got my warm t-shirt."

Enough of a non-sequitur to make everybody blink, before Gwen yanks him roughly and tenderly from the bin. She crushes him in a violent, desperate hug...

"You found me cause I'm your priority, huh?" he asks with a wide grin of satisfaction.

She kisses him fiercely. At the edge of tears. Whispers "You got that right."

.

.

.

.

SOCCER FIELD - 3 O'CLOCK PRACTICE

Jack coaching the girl's team. Toshiko one of many who surround him for that final word of wisdom "Alright my Little Warriors, remain calm; trust that the ball will find you; remember they're your opponent not your enemies - Now kick MAJOR butt!"

In the bleachers, Gwen sits alone with Ianto. They are having a coaching session of their own. Ianto points down to the field, where...Toshiko pushes her hair over her eyes. "She's gonna trip over her own feet, If she doesn't get her hair out of her eyes."

Gwen casts a sidelong glance at Ianto. Decides to tell him "Pushing her hair over her eyes. Means she's avoiding a confrontation."

Ianto looks over. Really? Gwen decides to share more. Reading Ianto's reaction. "If she's twirling it, she's playing something out in her mind. If she's stopped combing it, she might be depressed..."

As Ianto listens he's unconsciously threading his tie through his fingers. "What about obsessively picking her split ends?"

"Anxiety."

"Last week when she chopped her Barbie's bangs all to hell?"

"She was angry at herself."

"Gwen?"

"Yes?"

"When I fiddle with my tie like this it means I'm intimidated by you"

Gwen gives him the trace of a smile. "I'll keep it in mind, and use it against you."

She looks back down at the game. Ianto watching her profile. Finally he asks "You feeling all right?"

She doesn't turn "Not great. Plus, I've got things on my mind. You know."

Things. Ianto doesn't know. Blurts "Are you...seeing someone?"

Gwen snorts a laugh. In spite of herself. "Yeh, that does tend to make me sick to my stomach. Actually, I'm, uh... Thinking. Deciding if this is the time to say...thinking of going back to Random House. On a part-time basis."

"Wowie." Ianto smiles "How wonderful!"

But Gwen still hasn't turned. Eyes glued to Toshiko, racing around with determination. "Well, I could do most of it from home. But, while I'm working it out with the head editor, I'd need to..."

Sighs. Boy, this is tough. Tries for matter-of-fact "...make some trips into the city. Sometimes, overnight."

"Hey, any help you need, we'll cover." Ianto says instantly.

Gwen nods. Appreciates that. But she still hasn't turned to look Ianto in the eye.

"Uh." Ianto frowns "Have you told Jack and the ki..."

"Let's...hold up for a bit. It may not happen. Our secret, okay?"

A little strange. Particularly the hardness of Gwen's eyes. Ianto watching her. Something's up. He nods softly "Sure, if you like."

Gwen looks away now. To the playground just beyond the bleachers. Kids rise swings, clamber over a jungle gym. But her eyes are routinely, automatically, zeroing in on one single kid...who is climbing his way UP a tall SLIDE. Crouched over as he inches up the shiny metal surface, using the side rails.

"Careful crazy man" Gwen mutters. Ianto follows Gwen's eyes, just as... Owen reaches the top and STANDS UP, hands OVER his head, Gwen's breath catching, Owen totters once and... FALLS fast, hitting the grass with a thump we can hear, lying crumpled, motionless, as our two Welshies... SPRING up as one, SCRAMBLING down the bleachers, RUNNING toward sprints him, CLOSING on the child, as he rolls over grasping his leg, and Ianto reaching him first...some instinct makes him hold back, let Gwen RUSH past him, to kneel at Owen's side. She lifts her baby in her arms. His pants are torn, his leg is bleeding.

His own concern "I can still go to Tucker's party, right?"

.

.

.

.

EMERGENCY ROOM

A full house of walk-ins with assorted needs, none of which appear to require George Clooney on an urgent basis. Across the room, an irritated Gwen finishes the last of the paperwork at the nurses station. Exchanges a less-than-pleasantry with the less-than-helpful duty nurse, and heads off through the crowd, DOWN a hallway, TURNS a corner, to see Jack standing by a doorway. Smiling, as he gazes into a hospital room.

Gwen comes to his side, looks in. Owen doesn't see them. His back is turned, as he talks to Ianto, who sits on the side of his bed, feeding him the pudding he got from a vending machine.

"...for Christmas, okay? Every magician needs a white dove, a real one, they do!" Owen is demanding.

"Well, that's a long way off, sweetie." Ianto croons "We'll talk to Mom and Dad..."

"Dad! You can talk him into anything!"

Unseen by the two, Jack grins. Then, Owen snuggles into Ianto's arms and kisses him. Gwen stares.

Ianto starts singing softly "'In the still...still of the ni-ight...I held you... held you so ti-ight'...take it, man..."

Owen joins in, singing softly "Doo-wop-doo-doo, doo-wop-doo-doo..."

Gwen stands there. Her eyes are difficult to read. But she sure is watching.

Jack whispers softly "Nice, huh?"

She steps back. Looks him in the eye. "It is. It's about time."

He gives her a goofy give-me-a-break face. She twists the corner of a smile.

Ianto's a charmer, you'll see." Jack whispers "In fifty years, the kids'll love him ten percent as much as they love you."

"Stop." Gwen snorts "You're making me insecure."

Now they're smiling at each other. In the old way. A nice moment for them.

"You changed your hair." Jack suddenly blurts.

And we notice. It does look different. "It's temporary."

Jack grins "It's good. You're not pulling a mid-life crisis on us, are you?"

Her look holds. An odd extra beat. "Not the term I'd use."

He glances back through the doorway "You want us to take him tonight? Give you some private time with Toshi..."

"Never stand between that kid and a meatball" Gwen warns.

"Yet another spaghetti night." Jack teases.

"Yeh, better I should force-feed him burnt lamb and...couscous, was it he made him? Boy, kids go wild for that." Gwen rolls her eyes as the last meal Owen complained about Ianto had made.

"I'll drop him at Tucker's party Saturday, if one of you guys can pick him up. I have to go into the City." She pats him on the shoulder and breezes by him into the room. Owen wheels to see her do she asks "You know what happens to spaghetti when it waits around for you too long?"

He really thinks. Actually "No."

"Pray. We never find out." She fake growls.

.

.

.

.

A door with balloons opens. Stacy, the birthday boy's mom, stands there - children running behind her in party hats, all with their, conservatively dressed SUBURBAN MOMS. Ianto's attire a sharp contrast.

"Hi, I'm here to pick up Owen."

"Does Gwen know this?"

"No. I'm doing it behind her back." Ianto deadpans.

"In seven years Gwen's never missed one of Tucker's parties." Stacy frowns "Where is she?"

"Something came up. C'mon Owen!" Ianto calls out "I've got a shoot at three..."

"Tucker hasn't opened Owen's present yet - it won't be too much longer."

Ianto eyes the mound of presents yet to be opened.

.

.

.

.

45 minutes later...Ianto, in a pointed party hat, sits schmushed on the couch in between all the other MOTHERS. A black suit stranger in a strange peach land. He eyes that mound of presents. Not even a dent.

He pulls out his cell phone, moves towards the hallway. "Hey Andy...pull a number 64 steel blue gel on the back light...yeah I'm on my way but..."

A piece of CAKE FLIES through the air and LANDS on Ianto.

Stacy scolds "Now Owen, let Tucker play with his Bat cave..."

Owen won't let go of Tucker's presents. Tucker tries to take it. Owen is adamant. Ianto reaches for him, tousling his hair.

"Hey Owen-boy - chill." he shimmies away from him as Ianto turns back to the phone "He's there already? No I don't want to talk to him - Duncan? How are you..."

The mothers are all too aware of Ianto on the phone. Two kids shoot water guns - Ianto gets drenched. Owen pulls at the toys "I want it!"

"Owen I know you're angry and confused but it's Tucker's birthday party." Stacy squeaks as Owen and Tucker fight for it - the mothers all look to Ianto.

"Owen" Ianto barks, then croons into phone "Duncan I'm aware of that - Goddamn it Owen! Let go of it. NOW!"

He stares at him. It looks like he's gonna let go - the mothers are impressed, not to mention surprised. Then Owen suddenly hurls the toy onto the floor shattering it! A horrible SILENCE falls over the room.

Broken only by the sound of Duncan SCREAMING from inside the phone. "Ianto...This is a big bloody account -If you don't show up in five minutes..."

Ianto takes Owen and leads him into another room.

"Owen I'm sorry. It's been a hard day. Now would you do us both a favour and take this phone and..." he SLAMS the phone SHUT. Hands it to Owen. "...make it disappear."

"Okay." He SHOVES it down the front of his pants. The peach moms are taken aback. Ianto nods, you got it. Delighted, Owen turns, scampers off, as...his pants start RINGING. He stops dead. Looks down at them. Still RINGING. He turns around and waddles delicately back to Ianto, as if he's carrying nitro in his shorts.

he holds out his hand "Break out the Geiger counter, the man is radio-active!"

Owen pulls the ringing phone from his pants. he grasps it without hesitation, while peach moms wince in disgust. SNAPS it open. "Get over it, Dunc..."

Stops "...whoa, whoa, Toshi..."

Listens. While everybody watches. "Could it be, maybe...anywhere else? Like...another galaxy would be more convenient."

Listening, listening. Everybody really watching. Even Owen. Ianto oblivious croons gently "Okay, don't cry. Flunking science is not happening."

Then he adds "Not on my watch."


	10. Ianto and Gwen finally see one another

All the kids are running around crazily in a hyper-sugared frenzy. Peach moms drink diet sodas and chat. Ianto making a call by the phony little carp pond "...just that her daughter left a science book somewhere at her house, and I need t..."

a starchy, powerful, crisply intellectual SENIOR EDITOR, in her early fifties and her power outfit is looking at the East Side below her window. "I'm sorry, Ms. Cooper is not here. I think I mentioned that. Twice."

Ianto nodding. "Well, she's been meeting with the head editor for the last few w..."

Sir, I am Senior Editor. Ms. Cooper left Random House eleven years ago. We have not had the pleasure of a visit from her in that time."

Ianto blinks. "Actually, she's going back to work with your company on a part-time basis."

"Excuse me. If Gwen were coming back to the editorial staff, I would be frankly delighted. And I would be the first to know."

Silence. In the midst of hysterical children.

"Thank you for your time." Ianto finally says.

"Don't mention it."

And Ianto's line. Is dead.

.

.

.

.

Ianto alone at Gwen's front door. Staring at the key in his hand. One last chance to back out. Mutters "What the hell."

Opens the door. Enters the empty home. Walks slowly, self-consciously down the hallway. Kitchen, kids' rooms.

"Now, if I were a science book, where would I..." And stops. At the doorway of the master bedroom. "Who am I kidding."

And goes straight to Gwen's desk. Starts rummaging through the incredibly neat stack of papers "Great, I'm leaving prints."

The open appointment book. Today's date. Just says, NEW YORK. nothing more. Opens a drawer. Stapler, clips, neatly-stacked stationery. Opens the bottom drawer, and...stops. he pulls out...AIRLINE TICKETS. Opens the folder. Continental Airlines. Newark to San Francisco. And tucked inside...a fax, neatly folded. Ianto opens it. The letterhead says, NORTH POINT PRESS, 134 Sutter Street, San Francisco, California. CHARLENE DRUMMOND, Editor.

Ianto reads the note

_"Gwen. Can't wait to see you here. I know you're anxious. But it's going to work out wonderfully, I promise. Til then._ _Charlie."_

He is trying to put this together.

.

.

.

.

Gwen takes a kettle from the stove. Pours the water into a tea cup. Then, fills a second cup. Drops a tea bag into each. Carries both cups to the kitchen table. Where Ianto is waiting. Ianto looks more than tense. Actually, scared. Gwen taking this in, as she sets down the tea.

"Okay, what is this? If you want to dump Jack on me, no sale. You're stuck with him." And before she can sit...

"I know your secret."

Gwen FREEZES. To stone. No one says anything. Two hearts beating at red-line. "I don't know wh..."

"I was looking for Toshiko's book, and I found your tickets. And the note. From your new boss."

"My what?" Gwen leans forward. Her hands resting on the back of the chair she never sat in. "My boss?"

"You're not working at Random House, I talked to them." Ianto admits.

"You WHAT?"

"You're taking the kids. And moving to San Francisco." Ianto almost growls.

And Gwen has to laugh. Cold. Bitter.

Ianto continues "Look, you've never liked me..."

"Don't flatter yourself." Gwen sniffs.

"And I know checking into your life was inexcusable..."

"Nobody likes a snoop." Gwen agrees.

"But I came here to..." All the air comes out of this young man. so vulnerable, so real. "...to beg you. Not to do it."

And at this. A look of intense interest crosses Gwen's face. "Really? I'd have thought this was the answer to your prayers. Lose the witch, and her two brats, in one swoop. Problems solved."

Ianto is clearly distraught. This is no act. "You can't take Jack's children away from him."

Gwen thinking. Reading this man's face. "Bi-coastal parenting. Happens every day. Jack gets the kids every other summer, every other holiday, it's not ideal, but people make it work, and..."

Ianto blurts "We can't live like that."

And Gwen straightens. Cocks her head. "Did I hear the word..."

"Jack." Ianto corrects himself "He can't live like that."

"Ah." Gwen snorts "Then let him talk to me. We don't need you to solve our prob..."

Ianto says quietly "...it's my problem, too."

And Ianto's eyes. Fill with tears. He hates that. Gwen won't take him off the hook. Stands waiting, until... "I got used to...thinking of them. As...my kids too."

"Really." Gwen can't help herself "By what right? Six months of part-time screw-ups?"

Ianto lifts his chin. Defiant and tender at once. "No right at all. I just love them."

Now it's Gwen's eyes. That begin to fill. And she hates that even more.

Ianto is pleading "There's so many publishing houses in New York. Surely, you could find a good one?"

Gwen takes a step back. Shakes her head. Goddammit, life is full of surprises. She walks around in a little circle. Turns back "Sure, I could. If I was looking for one."

Ianto's turn to be surprised. Confused.

"You're a moron, kid. You guessed the wrong secret." An odd, almost defiant look. Gwen reaches up to her own head, ...slowly, holding eye contact all the way, she slips the wig from her head. Her scalp covered by the partial re-growth that chemotherapy has left her. You can hear Ianto's GASP clear to Kansas.

Calmly Gwen explains "Charlie Drummond used to be a colleague at Random House. I'm crashing at her place, while I take some new protein injections my oncologist recommended. I can only get them in San Francisco."

Ianto's lips part. But no sound comes.

"Life's a trade-off. You get cancer, your hair falls out, but you do get to smoke dope."

"please" Ianto gasps "You're not dying."

The kid so painfully sincere. "No such luck. I'm beating the shit out of this. Pardon my French."

Ianto can't find his breath. She is clearly the worse off of the two, in this moment. Then he starts to nod "You bet you are."

"How the hell would you know?"

Ianto grimaces at her tone "I don't, but..."

"How would you know anything?"

That was sharp. Ianto startles slightly.

"I exercise, I eat the healthiest foods, you live on pork rinds and Ho-Ho's, and I've got cancer!"

That leaves a silence.

"And cigarettes." Ianto adds "I smoke, too."

"You are marrying the greatest guy who walks this earth. Who I have loved from my heart for twelve years!" Gwen rants "And you walk in. You smile that smile. You move that body. And he's yours for free."

She sags back against the counter. "And you. Love my kids. How fucking touching."

She comes forward. Stalks him. "Owen came out of my body! They said I would never have kids, why we adopted Toshiko at birth from the surrogate Japanese goddess who gave her to us… her egg too. Imagine, I fought for that baby … I … then the miracle of Owen. You look at me … I fight!"

"See, I know that." Ianto says sagely.

"I have given them more love and more care every fifteen minutes of their lives, than you could manage in the next fifty years!" Leans over the table. Ianto looks scared to death.

"Okay, I'm undeserving." Ianto agrees.

"Ironic, huh?" And staring in Ianto's eyes, Gwen's fierceness fades. "Ironic, that I'm gonna need you."

All the air comes out. Her heart as naked as her skull. "To be a little less… undeserving."

The look holds. And holds. Finally Gwen asks quietly "Drink your tea while I go vomit."

And turns, goes to the door. Turns back. "You love my kids, that's a start."

Ianto nods "We'll work on it."

And gone. Ianto hears her footsteps echo as she is climbing stairs. Ianto lifts his cup. Looks at it.

He calls out "This is very good tea!"

Then tastes it.

Makes a face.

 


	11. don't fuck this up

A graceful stone building with arched windows. A bar. Gas lanterns on the exterior wall and burning dimly inside. Stone gargoyles smile down on those who enter the heavy, bright red wooden door.

Drinks hour. Upscale crowd. Dim lights, clink of glasses, the hum of private conversations side-by-side. Civilized as hell. And at the deuce by the window...the man's head is down. We can't see Jack's expression, as he stares at his clenched hands. We don't need to.

"I thought a phone call was inappropriate." Gwen says softly. No one smiles at the irony. Not much to smile about. "I could have taken you to that restaurant, but it would have been a waste of money."

He looks up. She studies the pain then nods as she admits "I know. I wouldn't know what to say. If it were you."

"We're going to win this."

Gwen shoots straight back "Walk in the park. And thanks for the 'we'."

Tears fill his eyes. None in hers. He is stern "You're not alone in this. You're not alone. Jesus, you're not alone, okay?"

Gwen swallows. Tries a smile that doesn't get halfway there. Looks down.

"What happens next?" Jack croaks out.

"I live or I die." She looks straight in his eyes. We don't need the bullshit. Not us.

"Tell the kids together?" he asks.

She thinks. A barely perceptible nod.

"Want Yan someplace else?" he adds.

On that one. She has to smile.

"My compliments." She snorts "On your learning curve."

.

.

.

.

Gwen carrying two steaming mugs from her stove. These have marshmallows floating in them. She sets them down in front of her children. Owen starts plucking the marshmallows out of Toshiko's mug. Toshiko doesn't care, too busy videotaping her father. Who sits with this tender, compassionate, and therefore rather ominous smile. Doesn't take a smart kid like his daughter to guess "So what's up? Who's marrying who this time?"

Mommy's marrying Yan!" Owen squeals cheekily. He's happy. Gwen reaches and shuts OFF Toshiko's camera. And the directness in her gaze keeps the child from complaining.

Gwen simply states "Mommy's sick, guys."

"You have the WORST flu since..." Owen begins.

"I have cancer. Do you know what that is?" Gwen cuts him off.

He doesn't. Someone else does.

"It's what Grammy Lil died from." Toshiko whispers.

Owen's eyes WHIP OVER to his sister. He sees the cold fear in her face. BACK to Mom.

She seems fine, calm, smiling even. "Grammy had a different kind. There are lots of kinds. Hers was very bad."

"Is your kind bad?" Owens' eyes bug as he whimpers.

"Shut up." Toshiko snarls "She's going to die."

But the anger in her eyes isn't for Owen. She is glaring. At her mom.

"Actually, I'm getting better already." Gwen gives it straight. As if to an equal, an adult. "I had a lot of treatments, and they weren't any fun, but the tests show the cancer got smaller."

"A lot smaller." Jack adds. Toshiko cuts him an angry look. He's on her shit list, too.

"So you're okay." Owen nods, accepting.

"I'm still sick, but I'm better."

"You lied to us when you never told us!" Toshiko accuses and Owen hadn't thought of that. Nods now, yeh.

"That's right." Gwen agrees "And you're mad."

Toshiko just glares with all the hatred she can turn her fear into.

"I know how scared I get when you're sick." Gwen tries to explain "So I waited to tell you. Until it was getting smaller. I thought that was best, maybe I was wr..."

Toshiko barks "You lied. If you lied then, maybe you're lying now. I can never believe you again!"

Jack bristles "Toshiko, never say nev..."

But Gwen's raised her hand. Jump back, Jack. The eye contact with her daughter never breaks.

"We make mistakes." Gwen says gently "And we forgive each other. Because we love each other, very m..."

"Where's Yan?" Toshiko demands "It's Thursday, we get to be with Yan!"

Owen plays the diplomat "I'd rather be with Mommy."

"She's dying and Yan is your Mommy now! Or … or .. Taddy!" She jumps up from the table. HISSES at her brother "You are so STUPID!"

And she RUNS, halfway to the door...

"TOSHIKO" Jack roars.

She turns, STARTLED at the anger in that.

Jack is standing as he snarls "You do NOT run out on your moth..."

"YOU'RE WORSE THAN SHE IS! WHY DON'T YOU JUST DIE, TOO?" she screams and BOLTS from the room.

In the silence she's left behind Owen huffs "Toshiko's worse than everybody."

.

.

.

.

Ianto and Jack cuddled in bed, watching a video in the darkness. At least, Ianto is. Just now, Jack's watching him. "Well, I think you should tell him you changed your mi..."

"It's no biggie." Ianto sighs softly he's still watching. It's a French-language comedy. He can feel his eyes on him. Never turns... "It's just an assignment."

"It's Anna Sui, you should be doing it."

"Are you hungry? You could make us something?" Ianto asks. He's still never looked at Jack. Jack can see Ianto's getting irritated. He says nothing. Ianto then adds "It's two solid months, around the clock, Gwen needs some coverage, and you're in a trial, what are we talking about? There'll be other assignments."

Jack kisses his hair and flinches slightly. Tries to pretend it's because he's concentrating on the movie. "They're my kids."

"Great, wallow in guilt, you sure you're not Jewish?"

A long beat. He snuggles closer. They watch together.

"She's not gonna die." Jack pouts sullenly.

"I know that."

.

.

.

.

Gwen and Owen cuddled in bed, watching a video in the darkened room. It is not a French Comedy. They are, however, eating popcorn.

The door opens. Toshiko stands motionless, composed. Her face looks like she's been crying. She clears her throat "I'm sorry you're sick."

From across the room. Gwen stares at her. "I can't hear you."

"THEN TURN OFF THE CARTOON!"

Gwen cups her hand to her ear. Shakes her head, can't hear a thing. Waves, come on over. And slowly Toshiko does. Crawls up into the bed, on the opposite side from Owen. Into her mother's arms. Gwen kisses her head, strong. Big smile.

"I said..."

"...I'm not deaf, y'know."

They grin at each other. Like equals. Gwen picks up the remote, cuts OFF the sound. And when Owen turns to her she starts singing "In the still... still of the ni-ight ...I held you... held you so ti-ight..."

"That's Yan's song!"

"Sugar. I was slow dancing to that song before Ianto was even born." She laughs.

"Wow…Really?"

"You bet."

Toshiko chuckles.

"You think he's the King of Cool?" Gwen shakes her head. Pulls down the covers, pulls up her t-shirt "Does he have a tattoo?"

The butterfly. Just below her navel. Owen has seen this before, of course. Touches it, with his small hand.

"He wouldn't know." Toshiko sniffs "But I saw him in the shower!"

"And...?"

Owen looks to his sister. For the verdict. Toshiko shakes her head. Nope. "He is only the Prince of Cool. Mommy is the Queen!"

"He is but an arriviste." Owen drolls. A new word, apparently.

"A newcomer." Gwen nods "he's still got a thing or two to learn."

Toshiko nods. "You betcha."

Gwen resumes singing "I held you...held you so ti-ight...Toshiko you sing lead, you've got the voice...

She bumps heads gently with Owen. "The stud and I will doo-wop."

And as they doo-wop the back-up Toshio sings "For I love...lo-ove you soooo... promise I'll never...Let you go..."

"In the still of the ni-ight."

.

.

.

.

ELEMENTARY SCHOOL - NIGHT

Parents streaming slowly in for a PTA night. They are chatty, tired, preoccupied. And 95% female.

Folding chairs set in rows. Parents taking their seats with coffee and cookies. Up front, a table where a panel of speakers are beginning to gather. A faded banner says PTA - TENAFLY DAY SCHOOL. Gwen is nibbling at a single cookie, when...a figure slips into the seat beside her. Ianto is juggling a coffee and maybe nine cookies. Drops one. Gwen picks it up. Dusts it off. Ianto is repelled, but has to smile.

"Small world." Gwen smiles.

"Jack's depo ran late. I promised I'd take notes." To prove it, he balances the cookies on his thighs, and produces a notebook. Looks around, and in a conspiratorial near-whisper... "So I have to tell you something in confidence..."

"You're a cross-dresser"

"That. And. Toshiko is over her head. With Brad 'The Dreamboat' Kovitsky." Does a Groucho eyebrow move.

Gwen is unsure if this really means he cross dresses but tries to brush it off "She hasn't mentioned this."

"She was afraid you'd make a big deal out of it."

Gwen is hurt. Covers "Moi?"

"Toi. They've been 'going out' for two weeks, didn't tell me either" Ianto breathless and happy. Gwen attentive. "As you may know, 'going out' in the six grade doesn't mean shit. They don't actually go to a movie or anywhere, they don't even eat lunch together, it's just a declaration to the world that they're..."

"...going out, yeh. I had kids of my own, once."

Ianto flaps a hand "Anyway. He walks up to her in the lunch yard today. And tells her...publicly...that they're 'breaking up.'"

Gwen's mouth drops. "Oh, my God."

"Right. Which is the whole point of this 'going out' thing, so one of them can dump the other one, and they can imitate the whole passionate adult soap opera tragedy, without ever having to actually date."

"She's devastated." Gwen sighs sadly.

"Doesn't begin to describe it. I mean, you've got cancer, this is serious."

Ianto GRIPS Gwen's arm. "She spent an hour in the girls' bathroom, crying with eight of her closest friends, who are sending the message to every boy in the grade that Brad Kovitsky is yesterday's toast."

Ianto devours an entire cookie in one gulp. "So here's the point. I pick her up from soccer, she tells me the whole mess, and asks me what to do. How about that?"

"And you said...?"

"Beats me. Ask your mom."

"Oh."

"So she's gonna. Tomorrow." Ianto leans closer. Whispers... "Don't fuck this up."


	12. what to do

Gwen and Toshiko are sitting at the kitchen counter with maybe twenty hardboiled eggs. They are cracking the shells gently, and carefully peeling them.

"Well, did you really think you'd meet someone at eleven that you'd spend the rest of your life with?"

Toshiko keeps her eyes on her eggs. A craftswoman. "No, but I thought till Thursday."

Oh. "What's Thursd..."

"A debate. Man's inhumanity to woman. He's pro women. I'm con. Ms. Flannery is twisted."

"I could help with the debate." Gwen offers.

Toshiko gives a glum "Great."

Thinking it over Gwen admits "Actually. I could only help him."

"Every time I'm in the lunch yard, and he's with twelve of his retarded dorkface little adoring out-crowd henchmen..."

"You don't like his friends." Gwen states like it's not bvious.

"...they all yell 'There goes the Virgin Queen' or the 'Ice Princess', or some really clever cut like that. Like it hurts my feelings."

They keep peeling eggs.

"You wouldn't kiss him, huh?" Gwen guesses.

"Not with my mouth open."

Gwen says softly "Good girl."

Toshiko's eyes well up. She covers by concentrating all the harder.

"And what do you do wh..".

"I call him a fartface or a pervert, or something equally lame." Toshiko admits.

"You have to ignore him." And on this. Toshiko looks up. "He's not even there. You don't see him, you don't hear him, you're just too much of a woman to bother with little boys."

"This is a joke, right?"

"Nope." Gwen shakes her head. "All he wants is the attention. When he can't get to you, he'll try harder for a little while. Then, he'll give up. It'll be no fun."

The kid blinks. "You think Yan would do that?"

Takes Mom back a bit. Enough for her daughter to notice. "It's just he's younger. Maybe he remembers how to do this."

Gwen shrugs. Maybe. Toshiko studies her. "This'll work, huh?"

"Oh, yeh." Gwen assures her.

Toshiko takes heart from her mom's confidence. Nods, with her trademark determination.

"How many devilled eggs can you eat?" Gwen asks.

"Maybe twenty."

Gwen surveys the table. "We can always go to the store, if w..."

A sudden BANGING on the screen door. They turn to see a breathless six-year-old Tucker through the screen. The birthday boy at the recent party. "Ms Cooper...?"

"Tucker, is something wr..."

"How tall is your tree? The really, really, really, REALLY big..."

Gwen shrugs "Why?"

"Uh." He grimaces "How bad would it hurt? If you fell off the top?"

.

.

.

.

Gwen, Toshiko, Tucker and assorted neighbourhood looky-loo kids are looking seventy feet into in the air. Everyone looks like TINY DOTS running around the lawn. We are almost looking at the top of a giant evergreen tree.

We see a patch of red. And now a blue stripe. The wind reveals more - It's OWEN climbing to the very top of the tree. The calling of his name becoming more and more faint in the distance - His leg misses a branch - causing a cluster of pine needles to fall in front of Gwen - she looks up screaming "OWEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNN!"

Owen crouched at the top of the evergreen - as the wind sways the tree perilously back and forth.

"Don't move!"

.

.

.

.

An enormous crane moves through the sky. Gwen holds tightly onto Jessica, a diminutive five-foot-tall Firewoman, as they soar skyward towards Owen. A slightly condescending tone "That's quite a grip you have there Ma'am. Do we have an issue with heights?"

"Patronized the wrong gal. In a crisis." Gwen snarls looking her up and down "I don't care if you're a dwarf, so long as you do your job. OWEN! I'M COMING! STAY THERE! MOMMY'S COMING!"

"Ma'am, my arm's going numb, maybe you could loosen your grip just a little."

"That's absolutely out of the question." Gwen snarks then yells "OWEN! I'M HERE!"

The crane stops. Owen has climbed to the top branches of the trees; they sway from side to side like a Metronome

"Hello Owen." Jessica says calmly "Your mother says you're real good at disappearing"

"Owen tries to climb a little higher - Branches snap.

"Owen! Mommy's so glad to see you – Now stop climbing!" Gwen begs but he keeps climbing "Owen listen to me..."

"No! I have to get there."

"Where Owen?"

"Before you."

"Owen where do you have to get to?" Gwen is confused.

"Heaven. I have to tell him he's made a mistake. He should take Grammy Martha first. Or Grandpa Norman."

Gwen's heart breaks, unable to speak. Finally she croaks out "Owen. God doesn't like visitors."

"How do you know?"

"Ask her, she's a heroic Fireperson." Gwen points to Jessica "She does this twenty times a day."

"Oh."

Jessica begins to crawl out to him on the limb. "Oh yeh. It's in our official manual."

"That's right, Owen. That's why Firemen have giant ladders and climb up and down poles. They're like...messengers... carrier pigeons... between heaven and earth." Gwen desperately reaches for him.

"That's good cause we need to hurry." Owen turns to Jessica "my mom doesn't have very much time left."

"Then you know what we should do?" Jessica asks "We should go to the Fire Station together and ring the fire bell to get God's attention."

"Cause it's an emergency." Owen opens his arms, teeters, and Jessica has him. She reaches him out, and...Hands him to Gwen, alone in the cherry picker. Gwen grabs Owen, pulling him fiercely into her arms in a death grip.

From down below, the kids CHEER. The worst is over.

Gwen is clutching her baby for dear life.

Knowing it isn't.

.

.

..

Gwen stands in the doorway watching her son - her baby boy - sleeping. She looks drawn, but even if her body would let her sleep she couldn't.

She sighs a whispered "God...I will do anything...I will go through any amount of pain you give me. If you'll just let me see them grow up."

A slow ragged breath. "Is that asking so damn much?"

She leaves the room soundlessly.

Owen stirs.

.

.

.

Toshiko sleeps soundly in the glow of a night light. Gwen appears, leaning down to rouse her gently. "Toshiko...wake up honey..."

A sleepy "Mom? What's wrong?"

"Nothing sweetheart." Gwen sits on the edge of the bed, stroking Toshiko's head. "I got Ginny Weintraub to come stay with Owen."

Toshiko's puzzled look. "Why would you do that?"

"How'd you like to go someplace special with me? Right now."

.

.

..

The light of the full moon illuminates the night and we see Gwen and Toshiko sitting on a horse. Toshiko in front, Gwen with a strong hold on her. Both have their nightgowns tucked into their jeans, coats over them.

"Hold tight, sweetheart." She kicks the horse forward and they head off toward the rolling hills in the distance. Gwen and Toshiko ride faster and faster along the trail. Gwen has one arm firmly around Toshiko's waist and controls the horse with the other. Gwen closes her eyes for a moment, allowing the wind to wash over her. The smells and sounds of the night seem to free her, give her strength.

Toshiko relaxes against her mother and giggles with delight. Gwen soon joins her, and the sounds of their laughter break the silence of the night.

They come to a stop at the crest of a small hill and we now see the tears on Gwen's face. Toshiko can't see, and stares out at the moonlit valley before them. Gwen sighs "I'm never, never going to forget this."

Toshiko snuggles back. Happy. "Never say never."

Gwen kisses the top of her baby's head. "You're old enough to learn the loophole. You can say 'never, never'. If you mean it enough. To say it twice."

Toshiko yawns. So content in her mother's arms. "I'll remember. Always, always."

So Gwen grips a little tighter. Breathes a single word, just loud enough to hear "Promise?"

.

.

.

.

Ianto and Jack heading up the path to Gwen's door. It is early winter. Stark trees, a light snow on the ground. Ianto pulls his coat tighter around himself.

Owen rumbling down the hall to the door. Stands in front of it, as the bell RINGS again. "IS THAT YOU?"

"IT'S YOUR BOYFRIEND, BIG GUY, OPEN UP."

So he does. Gives him a sweet hug.

"Hey. Remember me?" Jack laughs as He enters behind him. Scoops his body in the air.

Jack says in a John Wayne voice "Listen up. That's a pretty big love you're givin' my best boy, pard."

Owen tries a Clint Eastwood reply "Listen sideways. I love him and you love him. Now what are we gonna do about it?"

They follow Ianto down the hall as Jack goes into a Mister Rogers "We'll share. Like good neighbours."

They enter the living room. Toshiko sits sullenly in front of the TV. Her overnight duffle and book bag and coat piled beside her.

"Hey, gorgeous, where's Big Mama?" Ianto calls to her.

No answer. Toshiko worried about something.

"She still packing for her trip?"

"I killed my math quiz, A-minus."

They slap FIVE. Go through the ritual of a three-step black guy handshake.

"And...other things? At school?"

Toshiko cuts a look in Jack and Owen's direction. Please not in front of the menfolk.

Ianto hisses softly "We'll talk. I'll go check on Mom."

Toshiko frowns at Mom's name. Ianto strokes her hair. Heads down the hall... Knocks at the open door to Gwen's bedroom, where Gwen is calmly, meticulously, laying out things beside her large open suitcase. She waves Ianto in, and keeps working.

Checking out the stuff Ianto asks "It's gonna be cool, huh?"

Bulky sweaters. Wool things.

"I can never figure weather. Last trip, I made all the wrong choices." Gwen huffs.

Ianto and has a better angle now. Gwen looks awful. Drawn, weak, masking pain with obvious courage. "Bad day?"

Ianto sits on the edge of the bed. Gwen turns away, goes to her open chest of drawers. "Can't complain."

Even her voice is carefully under control. Awkward, Ianto looks around the room. A stack of photo albums, scrapbooks, open. Works in progress. "Can I look at the pictures?"

"It's a mess, right now. That's my project when I get back."

So quiet, we can hear a clock TICKING nearby. Ianto's gaze returns to the bulky sweaters. Holds there.

"See, I'm not going to Houston, after all." Gwen huffs "Like you obviously figured out. There's this clinic in Montreal. We've studied their process, we like their success rate..." Two Welshies nodding, in a calm, matter-of-fact way. As if discussing recipes. "They combine some compounds that have been getting results in France, with vitamin injections. Seems to activate the chemo..."

Silence.

"So." Ianto tries to sound supportive "Hopeful."

"It's promising, this one." We're upbeat.

Ianto swallows. He's out of words.

"I really look like shit."

You look sick. But you look..." Ianto considers "together. Mentally tough."

"Yeh, that's bull. I'm going for serene, they say some actually get there." A shrug. The first bitterness to seep through. "Prob'ly low percentage on mothers."

She sits, unceremoniously, right on the floor. Pantomimes a smoke.

Ianto goes into his pocket.

"You try to centre on the big issues, y'know. What it's all about. What this whole trip has meant. But then, the really big issues keep swamping y..."

"Brad Kovitsky." Ianto agrees. Tosses Gwen a pack. Matches next.

"You don't have any pot, I s'pose?"

Ianto's eyebrows head north.

"The primo stuff is great for pain."

"I think my 'primo shit' got left in my 'bellbottoms.'" Ianto drones.

Gwen lighting up. Deep soulful drag.

"So. She ignores this little Kovitsky punk, takes the high moral ground..." Reading Ianto's face. Who is already wincing. "He's relentless. A major asshole."

Ianto is nodding "And you said..."

"What else? Keep on keepin' on." Oh. Ianto tries to hide his disappointment as Gwen goes on "She has to stick with it. Have the patience, the guts, to ignore the pain. You disagree?"

Half a beat. Ianto shakes his head, nope.

Ianto admits softly "Hey. You oughta know."


	13. stepping up

Jack sits with Owen, building a gigantic magic castle from a million Leggos. It's architecturally interesting. Through the window behind them, a cold winter rain.

God, sorry I'm so late" Ianto is entering, peeling off his jacket. Tired as hell. "Duncan is doing his Himmler imitation on this gig. I got yelled at for quitting at eight."

Under Jack's patient exterior, the stress is showing. As Owen watches, he replaces a key piece of the turret.

"Yeh, well, I'll be up all night on this brief." And then He shoots him a really sorry look "I've got a morning plane to Boston for the depo. Back Sunday night."

Wow. They lock eyes in the bond of 'what are we gonna do?' No problem.

"I made that paella you liked." Jack offers a peace offering "It's on the stove."

Ianto kisses Owen's head, Jack's mouth, that one lingering a little. Then, down the hall to the kitchen. Toshiko sits with her homework stacked, untouched. Staring out the dark window. Clearly, this is worse than death.

"Lemme guess. A bad hair day."

Toshiko turns like a hunted animal "She told me to keep ignoring him! So I did it!"

"Not a good result, huh?"

"You know what that creep and his frogfaced footmen are calling me now? In front of the whole world?" Toshiko wails "Frosty, the Snow Bitch!"

"That's so weak." Ianto snorts.

"Here's weak...Mom said she was gonna talk to the teacher and Brad's parents! Can you believe the humiliation?" Toshiko dramatically flops onto the counter.

"Honey, she won't d..."

"I told her if she pulled that, I'd kill myself, and she could go to my funeral for a change!" For a change. That's where this is coming from. Ianto reaches his arms around her and murmurs "Hey. Hey. I've personally never gone to a funeral. And I'm not starting anytime soon."

The phone begins to ring and Ianto whispers "Specially not in this family."

Keep ringing. Ianto checks his watch. Shit. "Nine o'clock. That could be your mom from Montreal. Now you need t..."

But Toshiko BREAKS LOOSE from Ianto's arms and BOLTS out of the room. Ianto watching in despair. Lifts the phone on the sixth ring, bright and soft "Hi. How's the vitamins up there? Having big fun?"

Gwen in a hospital gown. At the window of her room, rain pouring down on Montreal. "Eat your heart out. Is Toshiko there?"

"Yeh, she's...I'll get you Owen first, it's past his bedti..."

"How's she doing with Brad?"

A beat.

Ianto takes a deep breath before answering "Can I say one thing? I mean, the last thing I want to do is interere on the Brad thing, b..."

"Thanks, but it's under control."

A shorter beat. "Yah? Well, even the best mom in the world, the smartest, the wisest, whatever. Needs to know when to find a Plan B. Cos Plan A is not and will n..."

Gwen is tired, gives a short snap "It's covered, okay? I appreciate your concern. Can I talk to her?"

And real quiet reply from Ianto "I'll get Owen."

.

.

..

Toshiko lies on her bed in darkness. Clutching her pillow. Lights streams in as Ianto enters. Sits on the bed, next to this furious child. Puts the cordless phone by the pillow.

"Toshiko, I know you miss your mother. So why don't you say hello."

"Why don't you say hello?" Toshiko parrots.

"Toshiko pick up the phone."

"Toshiko pick up the phone."

"That doesn't bother me." Ianto huffs.

"That doesn't bother me."

"You think this is funny?" he asks.

"You think this is funny?"

"No. I think it's ugly."

"You're just a stepTad. So stop bossing, cos nobody's listening!"

Ianto's voice is even, in control "June 3rd, God willing, I'll marry your

Dad. And then I will be your stepTad. And right now, I'm not looking forward to th..."

"Suits me fine!"

"StepTad. You think that means you can step on me? Over me? That you're one step ahead of me? Well, you're not." Ianto cocks his head to one side, like he's seen Gwen do. Uses a strong voice. No smile at all. "You know when girls grow into women? When they have to. And this is your moment, kid. Ready or not."

Picks up the phone. Hisses low "Your mama is in a hospital, far away. She needs you, right now. She needs you to be big. To put the kid aside, and help her get well. Now. Fucking. Do it!"

CLICKS the phone ON. Hands it to her. Toshiko sniffles with tears on her face "Hi, Mom. How are you feeling?"

As Ianto leaves, silently, Gwen is at her clinic window. Cellular at her ear. "Darling, I've been thinking about our little Brad problem? And I think it's time we move to Plan B..."

Toshiko starts to cry "You cannot believe what he said, it was the worst instant of my total life on Earth!"

"I know." Gwen croons "I know how rough life can be. And how unfair. So here's what we do. Tomorrow, on the lunch yard, you walk straight up to that little jerk..."

"And bring my knees up, real hard, yeh?"

"No, that never solves anything. You talk like the big girl you are. About what you feel. And how he's hurt you. You know? You tell the truth." Gwen is nodding to herself. Knows this is right. "You use your words."

.

.

.

.

An actual subway car filled with pairs of animals, cats, rabbits, dogs, two horses peeking out a window, peacocks. Noah's Subway, so to speak.

Duncan and his client watch as Andy assists Ianto, who shoots the menagerie from low angles. At last, he lowers his camera. Check his watch. Shoots Andy a knowing look. And hands him the camera. Waves to his subjects "I love you guys. You're animals!"

And starts Walking off down the tunnel. Duncan looks at his watch, then JUMPS up, TEARS after Ianto, GRABBING his arm, SPINNING him around, he faces ...someone ready for this. "Its 1:45, I told you there's no one to pick up Toshi..."

"But you're not done!"

He licks his lips. Stands his ground. "I've got it. It's in the can, Andy can wrap th..."

"We don't KNOW if you've got it, we haven't SEEN it yet! Now go back and FINISH!"

Ianto's glare says do NOT fuck with me. The lion look we've seen on Gwen. "Which part of no don't you understand?"

"Look, I will send a P.A. to pick up the children. There are agencies that supply sitters, nannies..."

"They're losing one parental. They can't lose two." Ianto snaps.

The bottom line. Duncan looks as freaked as he is determined. "You're making a career decision here, I would strongly sugg..."

"Duncan. I've got an even better idea..." Ianto leans forward. In his face. So he barely has to murmur. "I. Quit."

A beat.

"You can't do that, I won't let you!"

"No, no, no, this is a job that's hard to keep, not a job that's hard to lose, can't be both." Ianto shrugs.

"Ianto, don't do this, you will never forgive yourself!"

He thinks that over. For half a second. "Actually. I just did."

And without further fond farewell...

He is gone.

.

.

.

.

The last cars are pulling away. Some kids are still playing sports. And sitting on the ledge by the flag pole...two children. The little boy is reading his Garfield book for the three hundredth time. His big sister is simply crying, openly, for a disinterested world to see. A car SCREECHES up. The driver BLASTS out the door, RUNS to then then crouches slowly. At Toshiko's feet. "Oh, baby, I'm so sor..."

"IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!" she cries.

Ianto is dying inside. Reaches to brush at Toshiko's tears, but the child SMACKS his head away.

"Owen, go sit in my car right now, and I will bribe you big time."

Excited, he runs off.

"I did what she said. I used my words, I told him what I felt, and they..." she gives a shuddering sob.

"...laughed, yeh. They laughed real hard." Ianto guesses.

Toshiko nodding BIG, gulping back tears.

"That's because men can be scum, your precious father excepted, may you live to find one like him, it is damn hard." And wraps his arms around the girl looking around "Now is that little prick still here, because if he is, I'm gonna rip his fucking heart out!"

"No, his mother's always on time."

"Great."

"And Mom says anger never, never thing worse."

"That's because your mother is a fine person, finer than I will ever be. Now, just this once...Just this once. If I tell you what to do. Can we cut a deal?"

Toshiko stops crying. This is what she has prayed for.

"Tomorrow is Friday, your mom comes home. You tell her you did what she said. It didn't work yet. But you're gonna talk to Brad again on Monday.

Ianto leans close "And you don't tell her. What you're going to say."

"Not use my words, please!"

Ianto gives a sarcastic smile "No, baby. You're gonna use my words."

The sun dawns. On a child's face. Ianto brushes the tears away. They won't need them anymore. "Okay, let's start with looks. I know he's handsome, but the best-looking people are so vain, there's always something they're insecure about."

Toshiko shakes her head. "Nothing."

"Does he have zits? We can call him Pizza Face."

"Nope. None."

"Help me here..." Into implores.

"Uh. He thinks his nose is too big. But it's not." She says after considering.

"Great. Big ears, too?"

"No. But they stand out, a little. Like this." Shows how.

"Done. He's a dead man." Ianto stands up. Walks in circle, thinking. Comes back. Strikes a pose. "Monday lunch, you walk up with attitude, you hear me?"

Ianto's Finger stabs out and Ianto gives a silly voice as Toshiko "Hey, Ear Boy! (does the ears) Listen up, Rhino Face, because I'm saying this one time! So your pathetic, no-life, ass-kissing little groupies here, better take notes!"

Toshiko is swooning with joy.

Ianto continues to speak as Toshiko "I dumped you, limp dick, when I got a peek at your deformed unit, which is sadly microscopic!"

Toshiko laughing, applauding.

Ianto then says as Toshiko "As for your pitiful knowledge of sex? I'm not wasting my time with some loser who doesn't even know what snowballing is!"

Toshiko raises her hand. "Uh. What is it?"

"Oh. It's an incredibly disgusting, and not remotely sexy thing, that they described in a movie I'd never let you go to. But it's real. Does he have an older brother?" Ianto waves a hand of dismissal.

"In high school."

"He'll be impressed. The clincher is, you walk away, then whip around... Like this." Ianto struts "The guy I see is in the eighth grade at Prep School, and he laughs his ass off every time we talk about you."

"But Yan..."

"A suitable boy, will be at this flagpole, on Monday, with a very expensive bike, and he will be a stone FOX if I have to call an escort service!" he promises.

The kid. Is breathless.

"Now let's go stuff you full of junk food." Wraps an arm around her.

"I've had the worst day. Till now."


	14. Gwen releases a cat from her bag of tricks

NEWARK AIRPORT

Arriving passengers are filling through the gate. Last, is a female Flight Attendant, Wheeling a gray-faced Gwen in a collapsible wheelchair. The woman leans to her "We'll get your bags, and the taxis are just..."

Gwen grips the wheel, stopping them. Stares, frozen, as across the way...three faces stare back.

Ianto gives a sheepish "Surprise?"

And Gwen LEAPS out of the wheelchair, runs across the distance, runs to scoop her babies in her arms "It's a miracle! I can walk!"

Toshiko laughs. Owen covers Gwen with kisses. Ianto watches.

From the crowd.

.

.

.

Ianto carrying the suitcase, Gwen has each kid by the hand, as they troop through the house to arrive at...Gwen's bedroom. Where Gwen freezes. Her mouth open. For Ianto has hung striking black and white photos of the children all over the room. One is of Owen's FEET, left shoe on right foot and vice-versa. Another glimpses Toshiko's beautiful face hidden in her hair. Owen sitting in a cupboard. Toshiko a bold ear of corn. Owen sitting on the bottom limb of the huge evergreen. Toshiko kissing her horse's muzzle.

Gwen just stands. Trying not to cry. "Okay. These are good."

"I helped." Owen admits.

She knows he did. Looks across the room at Ianto. No more words.

Let's go to the park!" Owen demands.

Gwen sighs. Smiles down at him. "I've got a lot of medicine in me, sweetie. And I'm a little wobbly for driving or running ar..."

"Yan can do that part." Owen says insistently.

Gwen absorbs that. And all it portends.

Softly Ianto says "Hon, maybe your mom would like t..."

"..go to the park. In the worst way." Gwen ends.

Silence.

Toshiko grins "Well, with Ianto driving. That's how we'll go."

.

.

.

.

Five swings in use. In four, the kids are pushed by moms or nannies. In the fifth, Owen is pushed by Toshiko. Guess who's going the highest. Two parents on a bench. Under a starkly bare tree. Gwen is drinking in the air, the cold, the day. Ianto watching that. "Serene. You're getting the hang of it."

Gwen doesn't answer for a beat. Almost as if she hasn't heard.

"Serene means you accept." Shakes her head. Calmly replies "Part of me hasn't quit yet. And the other part is still pretty outraged…When it's not terrified."

Watching the world of moms and kids. Who are not terrified Gwen adds "I'm thinking. Do I know you well enough to really chew you out?"

"No." Ianto says with a bland expression.

Gwen turns to him. Diamond laser glare "Have you lost your mind?! You fought years for that job! And you quit?"

"Oh. That." Ianto grimaces "It's just not the right time t..."

"Do what you've worked your whole life to do?"

"It was just a job, there'll be plenty of others."

"You mean, after I'm dead?" Gwen challenges and Ianto flinches. "Do you?"

Ianto leans in "Hey, you haven't quit on you, I'm sure as hell not gonna. I just mean, I'm juggling a lot right n..."

"Juggle it!" she replies "Move the darkroom into your house. You've got that room downstairs with the treadmill Jack never uses anyway. Don't lose your confidence. Don't lose your edge."

"It's the same choice you made."

"Yes. I made the choice that was right for me. And I don't regret it. But even for me, there were days when I felt so lost, so invisible. And then I'd hate myself for the kids not being enough."Reading Ianto's face. She speaks softer "I know you, huh? The car pools, the measles, the PTA. It's not gonna be enough for you in the long run. You have to think long term."

"I just want to spend time with them when I'm not rushing or on the phone or tired or..."

"That's parenthood. That's the job, with or without a career. I'm telling you the biggest gift you can give them is your happiness. They need you to be happy. Can you hear me?" she sighs "Cause if you're not, the easiest person to blame is the guy sleeping next to you. And you'll push him away, and then hate him even more when he goes, until finally you have no choice but to leave. And that can't happen."

Ianto's turn to wonder. He starts to say something, thinks better of it. Asks instead "That's the bottom line, isn't it? I can't make a mistake. Because it'll screw your kids."

Gwen does not answer so he glances over "My advice to you? Don't die."

"Feeling the pressure?" she sneers with fake annoyance Ianto know knows it just a front.

Ianto's eyes move across Gwen's face. Then, out to Owen, on the distant swings. "Last time I pushed him? He said, 'Higher, Yan. It makes my penis sting.'"

Thin smile. Now it's Gwen watching Ianto's profile.

Ianto continues "I'm gonna buy him that white dove for Christmas. If I don't, you'll get him a fucking eagle!"

Gwen keeps watching him. And in a quiet voice shares "Owen was born in two hours, went right to my breast and camped there for three days. Always with this...mischievous look..."

Watches Ianto nodding, absorbing. "Somehow, his blanket always looked like a cape, even the nurse said that. He loves to hear that story, over and over. How he was born a magician."

Softly, never turning Ianto whispers "and her...?"

"Took 28 hours. She just wasn't sure about entering this world. Almost killed her surrogate… and me waiting" Watches the feeling well in Ianto's eyes. Ianto nods. It fits. "That's who she is. Don't let anybody rush her."

Silence. A murmur from Ianto "I'll keep that in mind."

Ianto settles back. His eyes now locked away somewhere private.

Quietly Gwen asks "What?"

Yan smiles. Amused that Gwen sensed something. "It's not about the kids."

Looks over. Decides whether to ask "That thing you said before. Pushing the guy sleeping next to you away. Because of what you gave up for motherhood..."

"Is that what he told you?"

"He won't discuss it. Just calls it history." Ianto shrugs. Accepts she will probably not tell him either.

A trace of edge to Gwen's smile. But no real anger. "Well, he got that part right."

Looking. Looking. Ianto squints "So what's the part he got wrong?"

An urgency in that as Ianto leans closer "I got all day."

.

.

.

.

Jack and his bulky briefcase, coming down the stone steps two at a time, until he sees him. In his winter coat. Smoking as if it could keep him warm. And despite the tension, he grins, heads over. "What a great surpri..."

"Hold your applause. We're not having fun, here." And from Ianto's face he means every word.

Concerned Jack asks "Is Gwen okay?"

Great. Just what he wants to hear. "Oh yeh, she was cracking me up. Dishing details of her sordid marriage breakup."

Ah. A beat. To assess the damage. Jack sighs "And you freaked. A little. Hey..."

"Just like to make sure." Ianto continues "That your past. And my future. Are real different."

Jack promises quietly "Well, they will be."

Ianto drolls hard and low "Imagine my relief. So what's for dinner?"

He sighs. Jesus. "Why in the world would she t..."

"You took a fishing trip with the boys. Liked it so much, you took another."

"I needed some time away." Jack says lamely.

"...while she watched the kids. Then, you booked this flat in Paris for your family's summer. But she said..."

Jack is weary now "...the kids have camp. Their friends are here. Over there, I'll just be shopping in a language I don't even know. My life, and the kids' lives, aren't here to service your mid-life crisis.' Did it go like that?"

It did. People are passing them. They do not notice. Jack shrugs "She called it a fight. The fight."

"What do you call it?" Ianto snorts "You told her you had doubts."

Jack looks around. People are moving on. Toward their drinks, their dinners, their lives. "Can we go sit somewhere?"

"Let me put it this way. Hell, no." And takes out his cigarettes. His fingers fumble slightly. It isn't the cold.

"I told her I loved her."

"By way of saying you were unhappy."

"Restless." Jack amends.

"Excuse me. 'Things are so confusing for me, Jack. Our life feels too comfortable, too safe, too predictable. It's a partnership, it's juggling schedules. When I think of playing that out, every day, for the rest of my life...' you told her that too" Ianto looks dead at his eyes.

And he nods. Once. Whispers softly "'...I don't know if I can make it.'

That's what I said. But I didn't leave."

"No, she threw you out. What a difficult woman." Pulls out a box of matches. "So now I get to wait...(A single match_)...For the first sign. The first fishing trip... (STRIKES it. Shields it from the wind.) What do you figure, Jack? When am I too old to be exciting? When your daughter brings home her college roommate?"

Lights his cigarette. As he watches.

Softly Jack snarls "That's a pretty ugly thing you just said."

"No, here's ugly. 'I love you, babe. It's just our life together I'm not so sure about...' right?" Big draw. Never wavering from his eyes. "'But keep dancing, and if you're lucky, I might just never leave, who knows?' yeah?"

"That's not us."

"Because you've changed so much." Ianto nods.

He puts his hands on Ianto, gently. But he flinches. So the hands come away.

"You want me to show you the future. Well, I can't darlin'. I can't." Jack sighs as Ianto searches the lovelight in his eyes. As if he could weigh it "We make our lives, one step at a time. We do the best we can. The truth about the future? A promise. Is only a hope."

"How about the promises we make to our kids? About their future. Do we shrug those off, just that easily?" That slows him down. "Maybe Toshiko deserves to find out who really broke up her family. While her mom is still around."

Stops him. Cold.

Ianto adds a quiet "Hey. Just a thought."

Ianto flips his cigarette to the gutter. Shrugs. "You got one less for dinner."

Takes a step back. Only one. But it registers.

"Where you goin'?" Jack asks with obvious dismay.

"I'm gonna get me a drink." Nods, to himself. "And I'm gonna drink it alone."

And he walks off.

Slow.

* * *

 


	15. raw

Owen alone in the back seat. Reading his beloved Garfield book. The two grups standing by the car. Ianto looks a little anxious "You really didn't have to come, you know. I'd have brought them straight t..."

Gwen staring at something "Who in the world is he?"

See now, across the way. A gorgeous BOY, dressed cool, stands holding an expensive bike. And chatting happily with Toshiko. In the distance, other kids pretend they aren't watching. "Looks nice enough to m..."

"He looks familiar." Gwen frowns "Did he do a Calvin Klein ad?"

Across the way, the boy leans, kisses Toshiko sweetly on the cheek. Waves to her. Peddles off. In distance, kids are dying.

Toshiko pretends not to know that. Just walks casually toward them, but as she approaches, she can't help breaking into a RUN, straight..into IANTO'S ARMS. She is breathless "It workeditworkeditworked! Omigod, you can't believe the look on his face!"

SQUEEZING Ianto tight enough to crush his bones. And although Ianto hugs back, although he kisses Toshiko's hair...His eyes are locked to Gwen's.

Houston. We have a problem.

.

.

..

Ianto alone by the weathered redwood swing and slide set. He is pacing in a circle, looking like a kid waiting to see the principal. Sucking his cigarette like smoke was oxygen. He picks a bottle of beer off the grass. Twists the top. Settles awkwardly on the seat of the taller swing.

Hears the screen door open. Bang shut. Ianto takes a sip. Before he looks up.

Gwen speaks low, calm "Now we're going to have a fight, you and I."

Ianto reply is barely audible "Are we."

"And I'm going to win." Gwen sniffs.

Ianto looks straight into her eyes "Don't be too sure."

No anger in Gwen at this moment. The ferocity of that mother lion. The strongest face we'll ever see. "Now, 'limp dick', I know. What. Is 'snowballing'?"

"It doesn't matter, I didn't tell h..."

"Because there'll be, oh, 20 or 30 mothers phoning me in the next hour or so." Gwen snarls "And they'll b..."

Give 'em my number." Ianto snorts.

Gwen on the prowl around this swing. Stalking her prey. "Actually. They'll want Toshiko's mother."

"Is that what you're worried about?" Ianto laughs softly "Looking bad at the PTA?"

'You are defending what you did?"

"Right down to the ground. Let's get to it." Ianto stands and faces her like they are about to fist fight or something.

Not quite what Gwen expected. "You put filth in my child's mouth."

"Aw." Ianto does an exaggerated pout.

"You had her lie about that...that fancy-boy model!"

"Worked. Like a charm." Ianto grins.

Gwen cannot even believe this.

"She was beaten, and bloodied, and it was going to go on, unti..."

"So you became the hero. And I became the schmuck." Gwen snarls. Straightening her spine "You taught my child that I am some limp dick loser. Who didn't care about her pain."

"That's not wh..."

"You think I didn't have some dirty words for that little putz? You think I couldn't figure out some low blows?" Gwen is roaring now, spittle flying as Ianto smiles.

"You weren't passing 'em out."

"Well, maybe your version of growing up is 'Just win, baby'." Stalking. Closer. Fierce. Right there. At the swing. In his face. "Mine. Is a little different. See, in that crisis, I saw an opportunity. For some real growth."

"Oh please. Shut the fuck up. I didn't go behind your back." That one scored. Ianto sips his beer.

"Doing the right thing. Knowing who you are, inside. Not caving to peer pressure, or lowering yourself to that level, steering your own course..." Gwen is still ranting as Ianto rolls his eyes.

"She wasn't steering her own course, she was steering yours." Ianto barks.

"Well, that's what parenting is about, little boy. They are pleading to know how they are supposed to do it." Gwen flaps her arms "And you sure as hell showed her."

Silence.

"And there will come another moment." Gwen says softly now, sadly "When the stakes are really there. And she will look back on this. And remember how good it felt. How easy it was."

"And she'll fight back again. God help me, what have I done." Ianto's voice drips with sarcasm.

Gwen's voice drops. The softness makes it somehow more menacing "You've turned her into you. And I may not get another chance. To turn her back."

"That's what it is. And that's all it is." Ianto is suddenly fierce. The hand with its cigarette stabs out "You won't get the chance."

You've got a point there, for a change. Oh, yes you do." HER finger stabbing out. Gwen back on her heels. Thinking. A mile a minute. "You didn't have to jump through hoops to get that woman to give you a little girl of your own. Then find a miracle happened. You didn't get morning sickness for seven months, you didn't breast feed spend every minute of every day thinking and planning and knowing that your decisions were shaping the people they were going to be..."

And now Ianto. Has nothing to say. He sinks back onto the swing.

"You are gonna be taking Owen's training wheels off. You are the one my little girl will confess her first love to." Gwen sobs "You will see them married, you will play with their babies, you fucking PRICK, I hate your GUTS!"

The blast washes over Ianto. And in the silence "Now you're talking sense."

"All year long, I've been watching how you do this. The worries, the sacrifices, the signals you give them" he looks down at his beer.

Thinks. Really thinks. Wants so much to say this right. "And I admire you. More than you'll ever believe. And yet...this...thing...has been growing. Inside me. "

Looks up. Straight to her eyes. "For better or worse. I'm not you."

And so he stands up. The swing shimmies in his wake. "I can't live my life channelling the One True Mom after you're gone. I can't do it. I can't do it. I. can't. Do. it."

Sets the beer down. Stabs out his smoke. "We have to deal with that."

And walks off, slowly. Across the yard.

.

.

.

.

Huge indoor space. Wood-sided walls, dirt floor. High corrugated metal roof, with birds flying, roosting in rafters. A little girl, under the keen eye of her trainer, puts her mount through its paces. In the cold air, steam rises from the horse's body. It's late, no one else around. Move now...down a walkway. Toward the stables. A barn cat is crouched, stalking prey.

See the horse, still steaming. Standing patiently.

Circling the horse now, we see Toshiko's back. She is slowly brushing out the sweat mark. Where the saddle used to be. Her movements are stiff, mechanical.

Toshiko's face...

The tears that stand in her eyes. The set line of her small mouth.

She swallows. Because she will not cry.

We hear a soft voice, speaking as she goes over the conversation she had before coming out to train. One we know... We hear a soft voice, speaking. One we know... See him now. Standing awkwardly, against the side of a stall.

"It was like telling her... ...that I didn't love her anymore...if I could be sure I'd always stay. She said, 'This thing you call a partnership. The schedules, the chores, all the things we have to work out...'" Jack's voice softer now "'...for the kids.' '...that's the life I dreamed of. And it's all I ever wanted it to be.' That's the kind of person your mom is. She's the best."

Toshiko says nothing. She drops to her knees. Begins to clean out one of her horse's hooves with a metal pick. The only sound against the stillness.

And her father watches. His heart pounding. "I complained a lot, baby. We couldn't travel, we'd lost our privacy, our chance to do things on the spur of the moment. To live for...ourselves. The way we'd started out."

He goes to her. The sound of his feet on the straw. "And she said. Sounds like you'd be happier. If the kids weren't around."

Crouches down. Very close to his child. "I said. I love them more than anything. But sometimes... I do miss what I've lost."

Toshiko stops working. Turns her face away.

"She said she could never feel that way, not for one single second." So he leans closer. "She didn't want to be with someone. Who could."

Silence. He's staring at the back of her head. "You know, this horse smells really bad."

"There's worse things." She finally speaks.

At least she can talk. If only just above a whisper.

"Do you know why I never told you all this before?"

A beat. She doesn't look at him. "Sure. You wanted me to blame her. Instead of you."

Waiting to hear...

Jack very softly whispers "That's right."

She hears honesty. And heartbreak. It makes her turn... "How come you're telling me now?"

He gets lost. Looking in those eyes. "I don't want to be wrong anymore. I don't. I want to say I'm sorry, because I am. And let you hate me. If you have to."

She swallows hard. Her eyes moving over his face.

"See that feeling?" he smiles sadly "Where you feel two different things at once? That's a grown-up thing. It's not a lot of fun."

She shakes her head very slightly. And her eyes water.

"Know why your mom never told you?"

She doesn't.

"She knew that you and her were so...solid. Nothing could rock that. But she didn't want to risk..." The hardest thing. He's ever had to say... "Your hating me."

"Cos she loves you."

"Cos she loves you. She wanted you to have a daddy to love. Even if he didn't...completely...deserve it." Now the tears in his eyes. And she's watching that. "You know how much love that is? That she has for you."

"Do you."

"There's going to come a moment. When she'll really need you to give that back. And you're just the girl that can do it. "

The way he says this. Makes her ask "How do I know when?"

"That moment will come. And your heart is going to whisper, 'here it is'" He reaches. First time. Strokes her hair. Winds his fingers. Around her hand. "And you'll come through."

She stares in his eyes. And dead straight. "If I miss it, daddy? You clue me in."

"Okay,"

He nods.

"That's a plan."

* * *

 


	16. drawing a line

The dimly lit bar. With its soft upscale buzz. Where Gwen told Jack she had cancer. Tonight, she waits alone. Watching the entrance. Nursing her drink. And then...Ianto comes into the place. Spots Gwen across the room. Weaves his way through the tables.

And he is there. Slipping into his seat. Not knowing what to say.

"Thanks for coming out." Gwen says softly.

"Neutral ground. What's up?"

Gwen stares evenly. Her chin rests across the back of her knuckles. She looks tired, but okay. Fuelled by adrenaline. "Jack called. He says you're checking out... Of the Heartbreak Hotel."

The waitress appears. Ianto too locked into the moment to notice. So...

"He likes a Stolie, no ice." Gwen informs the woman.

Ianto softly agrees "Double."

As the woman leaves Gwen asks "What's this about? Because we fought?"

"Don't flatter yourself." Ianto snorts, then a beat "I always liked that line." Sighs. "I love Jack, I love the children. But there is more to life than even love..."

"No, there isn't." Gwen argues.

"And I have looked down the road." Ianto continues "At what my life will be. And I can't handle it."

Gwen unblinking. Focused, strong. "What do you see? Down that road."

No answer. Then... "I never wanted to be a parent. Then, sharing it with you was one thing. Carrying it alone, the rest of my life..."

Gwen nods "Is scary. But you want it. Gimme some truth here."

The Stolie arrives. They wait a beat. The waitress disappears. Ianto shrugs "Well, it's the John F Kennedy Syndrome, huh? You die young, you always look golden. Perfect. The memory kind of burnishes the image, and..."

Gwen laughs at him "Come on, a wuss like me? The stiff who wouldn't help her own daughter fight back?"

"Maybe I was wrong on that one."

That sits there. In its sincerity. Gwen can't have that "Well, maybe you weren't."

And so does that. Tears are forming in Ianto's eyes. Here, in this public place.

"Look, when I said I couldn't channel you. That didn't mean I wouldn't give my right arm to do just that." Shakes his head. "Maybe I don't want to be looking over my shoulder. Every day for twenty years. Knowing someone else would have done it right. The way I can't."

Gwen waits. Thinks. "Trade you a smoke. For a secret."

The way she said that. Something weighty behind it. So Ianto reaches into his pocket.

"You know, I lost Owen awhile back? In a supermarket."

Ianto's hand freezes. In mid-course. "You're lying."

"I lost him. I was panicked."

"You are lying, you never lost that kid for 4 seconds, you could find him from a coma, there is no WAY!" Ianto shakes his head, leaning back to show his annoyance.

Gwen smiles "I was running around like a chicken with my head chopped off. Doing my imitation of you."

Ianto still not buying... "Owen never mentioned it."

"He only remembers I found him. My point is, telling you this story would have been the kindest, most helpful thing I could ever have done for you." The smile fades. "Why didn't I?"

"Uh. You hate my guts?" Ianto sing-songs, passing the cigarettes over.

"We were competing. Even then. Yes we were. Instead of being partners. Watching each other's back. Seeing things were covered." Gwen admits. Pulls out a smoke. Offers the pack "You're not scared you'll think you don't measure up. You're scared they'll think it. That's the JFK thing, yeh?"

Ianto takes one. Eye contact holding. "With good reason. They fucking worship you as it is."

"What do I have that you don't?"

Ianto laughs as he waves a hand up and down in front of her "Everything. You're...the Earth Mother incarnate..."

"You're the hip and fresh."

"You ride with Toshiko..."

"You'll learn."

"You know every story, every wound, every memory, their whole life's happiness has been wrapped up in you, every moment..." Ianto pauses, his pain now raw to see. God. He loves these kids, is already mourning them. For them.

"I have their past." Gwen agrees, strikes the match. "You. Have their future."

Ianto stunned. By the simplicity of it all. Slowly, he leans to accept Gwen's flame.

"Don't you get it?" she sighs wistfully "You look down the road to her wedding. You're in the room alone with her, fitting her veil, fluffing her dress. Telling her no woman was ever that beautiful." Tears now. Starting in two pairs of eyes "And your fear is. She'll be thinking. I wish Mom were here."

Gwen pauses and lights her own. "And mine is. She won't."

Her hand trembles as she takes a drag. "Now that's enough fear for either one of us to kill the other. And no jury in the world would convict."

Gwen raises her glass. "We're guilty, boyo. Of being human. And we can't forgive ourselves."

Holds it forward. In a toast. "But I forgive you."

And slowly, Ianto lifts his own glass.

CLICKS it with Gwen's.

"Don't rush me." He finally sighs "I'm deciding."


	17. memories made

White Christmas outside the window. Richly trimmed tree, presents everywhere, carols softly playing. The whole nine yards. Jack and Owen standing at a wrapped bird cage, where a dove is cooing inside. Toshiko is setting out the cocoa with a uniformed nurse.

Ianto enters. Kisses Toshiko's head. "I'm gonna check on Mom."

Goes down the hall, every emotion in the world is playing across his face. Into where Gwen lies on her death bed. She is beautiful and near the end.

Despite the IV tube, the monitor, she's gotten to serenity after all. As close as any of us will ever get.

"Hey, gorgeous. Time for the presents?" Gwen licks her lips. Pretty dry. Ianto takes a cotton lemon swab from the nightstand. Tenderly, cleans Gwen's mouth then a gentle kiss "Now Edna says you short-changed your last meds. You can do presents and be comfortable at the same time, y'know."

Gwen clears her throat then rasps out "Just want to be a little sharper. For a few minutes."

"A few minutes." Ianto repeats teasingly "Some things to say. To the kids, huh?"

Gwen smiles. "Then, bring in the presents. We'll have big fun."

Ianto can't really bear this. "You know, there's nothing you have to say. Because they know your heart. You don't have t..."

"Just sit me up. Nice and tall. Bring Owen first." Staring at each other. Then Ianto reaches his arms around Gwen, and as gently as he can manage, lifts her to a full sitting position. "Scrapbook."

Ianto brings the big book. Lays it on the bed. And goes.

Gwen begins to turn the pages. Her life with these children passing before her eyes. No tears. No smile. Just full attention. Fingertips touch the one she was looking for, as the door opens. Owen, hesitant, enters alone. His mother's face is fine and strong and smiling. "Find the bird cage?"

Owen is standing there nervously "Taddy says it's from you."

"Well, don't make him disappear before I see him."

"Owen nods. Okay, I won't."

She glances to the scrapbook "Oh, look at this."

And forgetting his uneasiness, he runs over, climbs onto the bed. Gwen doesn't wince, doesn't even blink. Nothing for his memory bank but smiles. He looks at the photo...Gwen holding a spunky newborn. "That's you and me. Our first photo as a couple."

He nods. Really staring at it. "Did you know I was good-looking right away?"

She reaches to hold his face in her hand. Stares in his eyes. "This good-looking. Was beyond my imagination."

She leans. Kisses his lips lightly. How many more times will she get to do this? a murmured "So what do you think we're gonna talk about?"

Owen gives it straight back "You dying."

She nods. Her smile is right there.

The secret of it. That only magicians. Can ever understand." She whispers. His eyes brighten. The sadness pushed aside. "See, when we die... Our body goes away. Our body. But we...we are not our body, are we?"

He doesn't know. Maybe he thought we were.

"If a soldier loses his legs in a war. Is he the same guy? Sure he is." She points out.

"But you can still see him." Owen frowns.

"Half. Of him." This is so fucking hard. But her eyes stay dry. "Dying. Is where the whole body goes away. So you can't see any of it. But..."

Rests her hand tenderly. On his hair. "What do magicians know?"

Leans forward.

"Here's the secret...Just because you can't see it. Doesn't. Mean. It's gone. Does it?" And Owen smiles. He is inside the secret. "The world. Thinks I'm gone. But only the magician. Knows better."

"So where are you?"

She was waiting for this. For a long time. She wraps her hand around his fist. And puts their hands against his heart. a whisper "Right here. Right here. Inside the magician. Shhhh."

"Can I talk to you? When you're there." His sweet face so honest as he stares at his own chest with wonder.

"Always. Always. And you won't hear a voice. But in here. You'll know. What I'm saying." Gwen promises as he looks up at her "Yes, you will."

"It's not good enough." He pouts.

"No, it isn't. Because it isn't everything. And we want everything, don't we?"

He nods. They do.

"But God does let us keep the one best thing we have together. The one best thing we've always had. Know what it is?" He doesn't. But he wants to. "I love you. And you love me." Comes closer. Nose to nose. "It's worth a lot. Will you keep it?"

He answers. With a kiss.

.

.

.

Jack and Toshiko are doing a hugely complex jigsaw puzzle. Owen runs in, falls on his knees by the puzzle. Without looking at Toshiko, he tells her "Your turn. It wasn't bad."

Toshiko looks straight to her dad. There is a moment, a silence, that no one else could ever understand. She leans to him and whispers "Here it is?"

His eyes water. He takes her in his arms. Whispers close to her ear, only the words "Here it is."

She smiles at him. Fear gone, filled with resolve. Gives him a kiss. Rises, to follow Ianto down the hall. Yan wraps an arm around his big girl. No words, except a murmured 'You can do this' Voice cracking. He's not as good at it as this girl's mother. "You can do anything."

At the door. Opens it, and Toshiko enters alone. The door closes behind her. Her eyes lock with her mother's. No words. Toshiko's eyes filled with tears, and Gwen's arms...REACH out, and Toshiko RUNS to them.

They hold each other. For a forever moment.

"I don't want to say goodbye."

"Don't." Gwen whispers "Take me with you."

And Toshiko looks up. Tears on her face.

"Thank God. I got to see you." Gwen sighs "Grown up."

"I'm not".

Gwen says very softly "Let me be the judge of that."

And Toshiko climbs onto the bed. Their hands never stop touching each other. Saying I love you.

"There's an amazing thing when a woman has a daughter. One day you look up, and you see...a sister." Gwen smiles "Someone. You can say. Anything to."

"Anything." Toshiko repeats.

"I wrote a whole lot of letters. To each of you. And the envelope says when to open it. Like, which birthday. Or...when you get your driver's permit. First time you see Rome. Things like that."

Things like that. Toshiko is beginning to lose it now. So Gwen says only "Keep Owen's for awhile, okay? Until he's old enough to not open them all at once."

"Until he's old enough to read."

Tears on Toshiko's face. Her mom wonders "Are you afraid for me? Where I'm going."

"Yes."

"Don't be. I'm going. Where we all go. Now how can that be bad."

"I'll miss you so much." Toshiko isn't crying, her heart hurts too much for even that.

"Good. That's very good." She nods, yes it is. "What you're grown-up enough to know. Is that people. Can do two things at once. Okay?"

She brushes at her baby's tears. Then tastes her wet fingertips. Mmmn, surprisingly good. Toshiko sort of smiles. "You can miss me. And. Take me with you."

Hold the child's face. In her hands. "When you're in trouble. Have me there. When you fall in love. Have me there. You can."

Said with such absolute assurance. "That's how we go on, you know. Forever. Because someone takes us along."

Toshiko swallows hard.

"On your wedding night. When your babies are born. I want to be there. Will you take me?"

A straight question. It needs an answer.

"Always, always. Always."

A sigh. A shared smile.

"You made my life wonderful." Gwen whispers. "You are the greatest gift anyone ever gave me. My baby girl. You."

"Take that with you, too."

.

.

..

The presents are here now, they fill up the room, spill over the bed, where both children sprawl.

Owen RIPPING the shit out of wrappings like a wolverine, Toshiko carefully saving her gift paper as if she were going to hang it in the Louvre.

She holds a tank top up to her chest, for her Mom's approval. Gwen's not sure.

Owen screams as he finds the one his parentals worked on together. Ianto's' photographs and Gwen's sewing. A cape. A real magician's cape complete with hidden pockets. The best part is the photos all over the fabric, ones of his mother looking so pretty, serene and magical her own damned self.

Toshiko cradles the best gift. Her Mother's scrapbook is in her own lap. She will treasure it forever.

Gwen is waning, lying back watching the madness as Ianto occasionally reaches up from the floor to touch her arm, like a reconnect. A comfort. She smiles every time. God. She feels that love too.

Ianto handing up more boxes, Jack in charge of bagging trash...Owen's white dove, flying free around the room, zipping and diving.

No one cares. It's Christmas.


	18. goodbyes suck

Family and friends are leaving the wake, exiting the softly-lit chapel into a snowy night. They are saying goodbyes, kissing one another, going to their cars. And saying his last goodbye...Ianto turns to Jack.

Whispers, close to his ear. He looks at him for a beat, then leads Toshiko and Owen toward the car, as...Ianto goes back into the chapel.

Alone.

The room is nearly dark. One soft spot plays on a simple Casket. No canned organ music, no sound at all. As Ianto enters. he goes to the casket. Stares down at it for a beat. And just above a whisper "See, I told you I'd do this. Only...Only. Now I don't know what to say."

His hand reaches out. A finger absently traces the edge of the wood. It seems a gesture of unconscious affection. "You'd have written it down, so you wouldn't blow it."

A slight smile. Here's where the love shows. "Maybe we should change places."

Nods slightly. _Maybe we should_. He takes a step back now, to a waiting chair. Sits. His hands folded in his lap. Thinks. "Well. We were less than friends, I guess. And more."

_More._

"We were never...girlfriends, we never dished. That wasn't... What we had."

No apology there. It's just the truth. "We had some battles, man, they were...world class, huh?"

"And I don't regret a one of them." Sad little shrug. "I miss them."

Thinking. Of how much more he'll miss. "We've got our secrets, we have. And I'll keep 'em if you will."

Crosses his arms. Lost in the moment. "But I wish we had one more night. In that little bar, remember? Remember that toast?"

"Sure, you do." His voice wavers. But the eyes are dry. "Know what? I forgive me, too. See? You're the magician."

A murmur "Don't worry, partner, I've got your back. We're covered."

It's what he came to say.

.

.

.

.

Lights and music and laughter. They're in black tie tonight. It's a wedding party. Up on the stage, at the head table, some guy is finishing a toast, and as everyone ROARS and CLAPS... "...so TO THE BRIDE! Thank GOD more than he deserves!"

Everybody shouts THE BRIDE. Everybody drinks champagne.

And the 'bride' stands up. In his white suit. In his hand, an envelope. he goes to the mike, and waits for the raucous cheers, the calls of SPEECH!, to die down. Calls to the man "I swear to God John, call me that one more time and I will shove my fist so far down your throat…"

Peals of laughter.

Ianto leans to the mike. Flushed and happy. And, oddly, nervous. "Now I know the tradition, so this isn't a toast. At least...not for me. According to Fuckface Hart I am a bride!"

More screams of mirth.

"The guest list is 114. But we all know there's one more here, tonight. Because..." Looks down the table at his children. Dressed to kill. Enjoying the party. "...my two sidekicks there always bring her along. Wherever they go."

 _Right?_ Right.

"So Gwen and I were sitting around. On New Year's Eve. And she said, 'You're not gonna talk at my funeral, are you?'" And now. It is quiet indeed. "And I said, 'I've never been to a funeral. I'm not sure I'll know how to act...'"

His sweet smile. Keeps the mood right.

"...but I'll prob'ly sneak into where you are. Just before it's over...' you know, before you go off to become crispy" Nods to himself. Fights back the feeling of that moment. "'...say something. Just to you. Get the last word in, when you can't talk back.'"

There is laughter in this room. Gentle, loving.

"So she says, 'No way.'" Holds up the envelope. Holds it tight. "She wrote this. She sealed it up, I didn't see it. She made me promise to read it. At the wedding."

And slowly, Jack begins to CLAP. And others join. And when it stops Ianto takes a deep breath and sighs "I told her she'd better make it dirty, or make it funny. Because...no way...on my wedding...No way in hell. ...could she make me cry."

APPLAUSE.

They are loving it.

"She says, 'It's a deal'."

The band plays an impromptu FLOURISH. Ianto begins to carefully tear open the envelope "Now, if it's too raunchy, we may have to excuse the kids..."

SHOUTS from everyone, ESPECIALLY the children.

He has it open.

He looks at it.

And everything.

Stops.

The world watches him sway, watches his eyes fill as he stares at the small card in his hand. He can't believe this... mouths to himself "Damn it Gwen. You promised."

The tears are welling. Everyone SCREAMS for him to read it. He leans to the mike, shaking his head "It's...no big thing, really... it's just...five words, it's..."

The place goes happily UP FOR GRABS.

A joyful RIOT of demand.

Tears streaming now as Ianto fumbles to pull up his white Jacket from the back of the chair. As he puts the card in the inside pocket to keep it safe, we alone can read the words...

OUR BABIES ARE SO LUCKY.

END


End file.
